Squaring Himself
Everyone has heard authentic stories of the man who asked another: “Who is that old slob over yonder?” and got the reply: “She is my wife.” But the story doesn’t go far enough.
Jones observed an old lady sitting across the room.
“For heaven’s sake!” he remarked to Robinson, “who is that extraordinarily ugly woman there?”
“That,” answered Robinson, “is my wife.”
Jones was taken aback, but moved up front again.
“Well,” he said persuasively, “you just ought to see mine!”
Pasture Pot Pourri
Oh, boys! What wouldn’t I give for just an acre of Cuba in the center of the Whiz Bang farm.
* * *
The reason why Dan Cupid makes so many bad shots is because he aims at the heart while looking at the hosiery.
* * *
Gi’mea Jane wit alit’l eye
an’ a nose so very long,
Two lips dat qiv’er an’ make u’ giv’ er
a sam’pell ove yoh ’tong.
* * *
I got a gal she’s neat
Sweet as turkey meat
With a great big leg
And toot’ie woot’ie feet.
* * *