An Arkansas Honeymoon
A young, newly married couple boarded a through train, bound for Little Rock to spend the honeymoon. The young man at once began looking for the Pullman conductor, it being a night train. Finally he found that official and began: “Say, Mister, me an’ my wife here just got married an’ we want the best ’commodations you’ve got on this train.”
“You are looking for a berth, I presume?” queried the conductor.
“Thunderation! No!” shouted the irate groom. “Didn’t I tell you that me an’ my wife just got married?”
* * *
A London man who went to Dublin to join the Royal Irish Constabulary was arrested as insane. In view of the present condition of Ireland the evidence against him seems conclusive.
Pasture Pot Pourri
Yoo-Hoo! Skinny! C’mon over, ’n bring your own bottle.
* * *
There was an old man from Trenton,
Who gnashed his false teeth till he Bentem;
When asked what he’d lost, and what they had cost,
He replied: “I don’t know, I just Rentem.”
* * *
OPEN YOUR MOUTH AND LET THE MOONSHINE IN.
* * *
Never miss anything that’s been saved.
* * *
It’s better to be brought up on a bottle than to be brought down by one.
* * *
A small boy’s idea of greatness is to be able to lick another boy a size larger.
* * *
Lip to lip
Nose to nose,
Flippety flop,
Away she goes.
* * *
When your good home brew is old and cold,
Call me up and revive my soul.
* * *