POLITICS IN THE LAND OF SHADES.
According to the old Latin idea, people at death take up spiritual abodes across the River Styx, a fabled spot somewhere, and reached somehow. Puzzle stories are required to stick to well-settled facts in chronology and theology no more than was ancient fiction. The following "true" story pretends to stick closely to neither "ology" mentioned. Here is the telegraphic (kite line) report, just to hand:
TO FOLK STILL ON EARTH:
Did you know there was an election held recently in the Land of Styx? Your newspapers have been so filled of late with details of your campaign that the contests in a mystical country have been left unnoticed. It is left to me to give to you the first news of both campaign and its results.
It was a three-cornered contest, this late political fight of ours, and here are the tickets in the field:
A.
For President of the Styx Club, the "Father of Chicago" (1).
For Vice-President of same, the great Egyptian who had his pillar ornamented with palm-trees (2).
For Trustees, the President of the United States who first suspended the writ of habeas corpus (3); the man (4) who ordered that Sunday should be made, in his empire, the Christian Sabbath; the discoverer (5) of the Ohio River; and the inventor of binary arithmetic (6).
For Chief Engineer of the Styx Fortifications, the architect (7) of the Great Fire (1666) Monument, London.
For Custodian of Estray Sprites, the founder (8) of the Order of Sisters of Charity.
B.
For President, the author (9) of the Marseillaise Hymn.
For Vice-President, the leader (10) of that company of Icelanders who discovered Greenland.
For Trustees, the king (11) who founded the Order of the Garter; the only United States Senator (12) from California who was ever nominated for President; the discoverer (13) of Cape Horn; and the inventor (14) of the panorama.
For Chief Engineer, the inventor (15) of silver mirrors.
For Custodian, the father (16) of ancient moral philosophy.
C.
For President, the first Roman (17) to wear a crown.
For Vice-President, the author (18) of "Hail Columbia."
For Trustees, the President (19) of the United States famous for his "Kitchen Cabinet"; the queen (20) who said, "We will not have our prerogatives brought into question"; the father (21) of tractarianism; and the discoverer (22) of aluminium.
For Chief Engineer, the architect (23) of Trinity Church, Boston.
For Custodian, the man (24) who ran second on the Presidential ticket with Horatio Seymour in 1868.
The election came off yesterday, and the ticket marked "B" was successful. To-night there is a grand river parade of rejoicing. At the head of the parade is the ship (25), building for a German firm, that has just been launched in Glasgow, and rivals the Great Eastern in size. Following it are all manner of craft and all sorts of people. Of the latter are those ancients (26), described by Cæsar, who burned everything they owned preparatory to migration, not knowing where they should go to. Behind them came the first permanent base-ball club (27).
But the feature of the unique parade was a great company of people (28) who first used parasols. And they carried such queer banners!
Three of the banners bore legends. The people, who have little else to do here, busied themselves all night trying to guess the things described. Maybe you can do better than we have, for up to this hour we have guessed but one of them. Here they are:
I (29) am soft and spongy because I haven't had time to dry. Some people doubt my existence. But that doubt is easily dispelled, for everybody on earth has seen me many times. I always float and have funny marks on me. I live in the cold and travel much. Good to eat? Yes,—and no.
I (30) am thin and thick; a liquid and a solid. I am long—very long, and I am short. I have written epic poems and doggerel rhymes. I have overturned nations, and carried news of deaths and births. I am several colors, but most people prefer me black. Everybody uses me.
Millions of dollars have been spent to find me (31). So have many lives. And yet everybody knows where I am. Fame awaits any man I touch, and yet I don't exist, and wouldn't be a particle of use to anybody if I did.
Above these words were real birds, perched on cross-arms and carried high in air. One was the bird (32) that might be expected always to carry a knife—to stab the candidate, maybe—as the politicians say. Another was the bird (33) that came from the backwoods. A third (34), one that would never do for a campaign torch, and a fourth (35), one that would make a good out-fielder in a base-ball nine if it didn't talk so much.
As I write you this the cannons boom, the adherents of the great Frenchman are jubilant, and the sound of his inspiring hymn is everywhere heard.
In this fanciful story are mentioned some famous people, either persons or classes, some birds and some other things which you may give the names of. All are described by a sufficient clue, it may be an act, or a peculiarity of their names. In sending answers, do not write out the story. Number names as numbered here, write one below another in the proper order, and put your name and address at the top of your first sheet of answers. Mail answers not later than December 27, 1896, to Harper's Round Table, New York—no street number required—and put in the lower left-hand corner of your envelope "Puzzle Answer." Correct answers, with names of winners, will be published in Harper's Round Table as early after the close of the contest as possible, probably within about two weeks.
The prizes, which will be awarded by the Messrs. Harper & Brothers, Publishers, New York, are: $40, divided among the ten best solvers according to merit. If one solver stands conspicuously ahead of the rest he or she will be given from $10 to $25, as the comparative excellence of the answer warrants. Persons of any age may help find the answers, but only those who have not passed their 18th birthday, and who are members of households in which Harper's Round Table is regularly read, may send them in. Merit signifies correctness and neatness, and has no reference to the solution reaching the office of Harper's Round Table first in point of time. Elaborate decoration of answers is not encouraged. Use common stationery, note size, and do not roll. Write on one side of the paper only. Everything comes to those who—try!