BICYCLE LINGO.
Fred. "The route I have in mind extends about two miles along the Hudson."
Small Brother. "Where does the tree stop?"
Edith. "Where are you going to spend your vacation?"
Bessie. "Mamma wanted to go to the Falls, but papa said that if she went to a bicycle academy she could see all the falls she cared to."
"Ha!" said Wallie, jeering at Maude for being a girl, "you can't ever be President of the United States."
"I know I can't," retorted Maude, "and I don't believe you can, either. You'd talk too much to get elected."