WHAT HE WAS AFRAID OF.
"I wonder why that dog howls so every time the band plays?"
"I guess maybe he's afraid somebody will put the band around his neck."
"How do you feel this morning?" asked the Butterfly of the Caterpillar.
"Oh, kind of creepy," said the Caterpillar.
"Look at that old Centipede with his hundred legs—how proud he is!" said the Beetle.
"Yes; and how absurdly so," returned the Katydid. "With all hundred of 'em he couldn't ride a bicycle!"
"My name is a great one," said the Lettuce head. "It has been spoken by one of the most illustrious soldiers of modern times, and is, in fact, engraved upon most of his monuments."
"Your name?" cried the Egg-plant. "Nonsense!"
"It is true," said the Lettuce head. "The soldier's name was Grant, and on all his statues you are likely to find his famous words Lettuce Have Peace."
"I tell you," said the Shepherd's Dog, "our lambs know how to treat those geese."
"What do they do?" asked the Cow.
"Why, only this morning as we passed them the geese hissed us, and those lambs simply looked at 'em scornfully, and said, 'Bah!'"
"Do you like fishing?" asked the Carrot of the Angle-worm.
"Well—yes," said the Angle-worm. "That is, I like it down near the Jersey coast better than in the mountains."
"What's the difference?" asked the Carrot.
"It's pleasanter for me fishing 'off the Hook' than on it," explained the worm.
The Cabbage and the Beet had had a race, and the Cabbage won.
"It couldn't be otherwise," sighed the Beet. "The Cabbage was made to come out a head, and I to be Beet."
"That squash is the funniest-looking squash I ever saw," said the Turnip to the Potato. "He's round and flat like a pin-cushion. Looks as if somebody'd stepped on him."
"Yes," said the Potato. "He looks more like a squush than a squash."
"I wish you'd keep quiet," said the Dormouse to the Corn-stalk. "You make so much noise I can't sleep."
"Well, if you had as many corns as I have, you wouldn't be a bit quieter," retorted the Corn-stalk.