THE UNPLEASANT PART OF IT.
"Well, Johnnie," said the visitor, "I suppose you'll begin going to school again very soon."
"Yes."
"Do you like going to school?"
"Yes; it's staying there after I get there that I don't like."
The Colonel had for a servant a darky that at times was inclined to grow lazy. For a long while the Colonel had noted this, and had scolded and threatened, but all to no purpose. One day there was a party of gentlemen dining with him, and among them a military man. The Colonel had entertained the company with anecdotes, and finally came around to the subject of his lazy servant.
"I can fix that fellow," said the military man. "Just send for him, Colonel, and I'll give him an order, and we'll see if he will obey it quickly or not."
The Colonel sent for his servant. As he entered the room the military man assumed a most severe mien, and gave him an order to go fix his horse's bridle, which needed looking after, "And be sure you do it right and quickly"; and he significantly drew his sword and laid it on the table near his plate, at the same time looking hard at the servant. In a short while the man returned and brought with him a pitchfork, which he gravely laid on the table alongside the sword, saying,
"Ise fixed de bridle, General."
"What on earth did you bring this pitchfork here for, eh?" exclaimed the military man.
"Why, sah, Ise thought that wid so big er knife like your sword the best thing to use wid it would be de pitchfork."
A bright little chap in the White Mountains wrote to his papa in the city the other day the following letter:
"Dear Papa,—I can't write to you 'cause I got nothing to say, and I send this 'cause I can't say it.
"With love, Bob,
"Please send some candies."
A POUTER.
"I say there, young fellows, you'd better look out;
That pigeon, I notice, is in a great pout!"