Ingenuous!
Jones (to his fair partner, after their opponents have declared "clubs"). "Shall I play to 'clubs', partner?"
Fair Partner (who has never played bridge before). "Oh, no, please don't, Mr. Jones. I've only got two little ones."
She. "And are all these lovely things about which you write imaginary?"
The Poet. "Oh, no, Miss Ethel. I have only to open my eyes and I see something beautiful before me."
She. "Oh, how I wish I could say the same!"
[At The R.A.—First Painter. "I've just been showing my aunt round. Most amusing. Invariably picks out the wrong pictures to admire and denounces the good ones!"
Second Painter. "Did she say anything about mine?"
First Painter. "Oh, she liked yours!"
"I say, old man, I've invented a new drink. Big success! Come and try it."
"What's it made of?"
"Well, it's something like the ordinary whisky and soda, but you put more whisky in it!"
