LIKA JOKO'S JOTTINGS.—No. 5. HUNTING.
Tuesday.—Parish Councils on again. That was order of day, but human ingenuity dragged in other matters. First Woman's Suffrage, on which there was livelier debate than has yet arisen in Committee on this Bill. Last Thursday Walter M'Laren raised question in form of an Instruction. Government resisting were beaten, the Opposition coalescing with revolting Radicals. Now, as Squire of Malwood puts it, the Government, kissing the rod, accept injunction; undertake to embody M'Laren's Amendment in Bill. Pretty to see air of doubt and hesitation that hereupon comes over ingenuous faces on Opposition benches. If Henry Fowler had put his back up, declared that Woman delighted him not, nor Walter M'Laren either, Opposition would again have joined forces with Radicals, and Government would once more have suffered defeat. Since they resolved to obey Instruction carried by majority last Thursday, Prince Arthur shakes his head; Edward Stanhope shows this is quite another pair of sleeves; whilst Joseph, back bronzed from breezy Bahamas, bluntly says he will oppose new Clause Henry Fowler has promised to bring in.
"It is the duty of an Opposition to oppose," says Prince Arthur; "and I did not for several Sessions sit at feet of Old Morality without being impressed with imperative sense of duty."
Mr. Courtney explains the Puzzle.
Later, when this difficulty temporarily out of way and it seemed progress with Clause might be made. Proportional Representation was dragged in neck and crop. Courtney took charge of the puzzle business, and tried to explain it. No prizes offered, and attention a little slack. Squire of Malwood defined the theory in admirable phrase. "It is," he said, "an ingenious system by which a man is to vote for a person he does not prefer in order to secure a majority for some purpose he does not understand." Can't better that; leaves nothing else to say. Nevertheless, much was said; talked by the hour; finally a division, in which Government majority, rarely falling below three score and ten, stood at 72.
Business done.—Something of the debating society order.
Thursday night.—Things coming to a pretty pass if Tomlinson is not to offer a few observations on third reading of Employers' Liability Bill without an arrogant Minister moving the Closure. Apart from consideration of individual liberty and freedom of speech, House would have suffered special disappointment if Speaker had accepted Asquith's suggestion and submitted question of Closure. Finding Tomlinson on his feet at this juncture it naturally thought he had, in interval, discovered what his amendments moved last week in Committee on Bill meant, and was seizing this opportunity of explaining them. He didn't; but that was all Asquith's fault. Enough to cow any man rising at ten minutes to twelve and having pistol held to his head in shape of motion for the Closure.
Just at the time when Tomlinson was coming to his explanation, hand of clock touched five minutes to twelve. He might still have used up at least four minutes; being flurried, he sat down; and now we shall never know what his amendments were designed to accomplish. Happily there was time left for Matthews to soundly rate Asquith for his attempt to Closure Tomlinson. Right hon. gentleman could scarcely control his tongue in the emotion under which he laboured, in contemplation of the attempted outrage. It would have been bad enough with an ordinary member. That the weighty and sententious speech of so eminent a statesman as the Member for Preston should have been broken in upon by a motion for the Closure only showed, in the ex-Home Secretary's opinion, how bad was the case of the Government, how reckless the tactics to which desperation drove them. A beautiful speech; almost, as Tomlinson says, worth being snubbed by Asquith in order to elicit this eloquent testimony to modest merit.
Business done.—Employers' Liability Bill read a third time.
Friday Night.—Great advantage of habit of foreign travel ingrained with Members of Commons is that when erudite question comes up sure to be someone present who can illustrate its bearings from experience gained in more or less remote portions of the planet. Just now Henry Fowler moved provision in Parish Councils Bill, making it possible for Lovely Woman, whether married or single, to stoop to folly of being elected on Parish Council Board. Up jumps Horace Plunkett with some charming reminiscences brightly told of residence in the State of Wyoming. In that happy land women enjoy equal political and municipal privileges with their brother men.
"I was," said Plunkett, "well acquainted with a female Justice of the Peace. She discharged her duties, and, when necessary, a revolver."
Another of Plunkett's lady friends in far-off Wyoming had her domestic duties broken in upon by summons to attend a jury. Case proved protracted; husband had to stay at home and mind the baby, whilst she was locked up all-night with eleven good men and true.
After hearing this, Committee unanimously, without division being challenged, agreed to Fowler's Amendment.
Business done.—On Clause III. Parish Council Bill.
SHAKSPEARE IN LONDON.
Buy no more, Ladies; buy no more;
Shops were deceivers ever:
One price in season, one before,
And reasonable never.
Then buy not so,
But let them go,
And be you blithe and bonny,
Converting "Robes, modes, et manteaux"
Into—"Pas, si je connais!"
Bring no more bargains—sales are low,
And bills are dull and heavy;
(The shopmen drew their longest bow
For Summer's rout and levée.)
Then buy not so,
But let them "show"
And be you shrewd and bonny,
Converting all their "Tout ce qu'il faut"
Into—"Pas, si je connais!"
"TEARS, IDLE TEARS!"
Punch's picture, "When the Cat's Away!"
Seems to have effect! The brutal "play"
Of young ruffians, in at least two cases,
Whipping has rewarded. What long faces
Trotter pulls! With his mild creed it clashes.
Sentiment's eyes are wet—about the lashes!
Howling brutes make mollycoddles snivel.
Let the ruffians rail, their champions drivel.
Brutalising to chastise brutality?
'Tis the merest blind sentimentality.
Feeble men and helpless women save
From the roughs, and let the weepers rave!