EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.
House of Commons, Monday, March 20.—"That's the best speech Harcourt has made this Session," said George Curzon, as we walked into Lobby to support Government against onslaught of Sage of Queen Anne's Gate, who disapproves its Uganda policy.
"Which speech?" I asked, eagerly, always anxious to learn. George Curzon just back from far East; has sat astride the Wall of China, and taken five-o'clock tea with the Queen of Corea. Ulysses, with his twenty-years' tramp, not in it with him. "Which speech?" I repeated. "The speech he didn't make just now in reply to Chamberlain," said Curzon, in that sententious tone, and with that grave manner he has learned among the Apaches of the Ural Mountains.
Wants thinking over, this; but is quite true. A great temptation for the Squire; would have been irresistible at one time. Joseph had made a brilliant speech, scintillating with diamond dagger-points. Yielding to the habit of heredity, he had been more than usually disagreeable towards his Brethren. "The original Joseph," as the Squire remarked, in a little aside, whilst the speech went on amid uproarious delight of the Gentlemen of England, "had one soft place in his resentful heart. But our Joe finds no Benjamin among us—unless, indeed, it be Trevelyan, and, I believe, if, after filling up his sack, he had put in any extraneous substance, it would not have been a cup of silver."
Time was when the Squire would have jumped at this opportunity. Benches crowded with jubilant gentlemen in dinner dress; excitement of cheers and counter-cheers filled House. Few things delight it more than encounter between these two brilliant swordsmen. Only half-past eleven; Twelve-o'clock Rule suspended; plenty of time for business by-and-by; half an hour's sport hurt nobody.
Mr. G. (sings sotto voco), "How happy could I be with either!
Were only Uganda away!"
When Squire rose, a ringing cheer went up from Ministerialists. Their turn now. Joe was "going to catch it." But Squire knew better than that. Opportunity tempting; almost irresistible. But business first, pleasure after. With touching air of resignation, Squire said they had listened to a very good speech, and now he hoped the Vote would be agreed to; at which point he meekly sat down. Shock so sudden and unexpected that no one but Nolan moved, and he, finding himself on his legs, had no words ready. Whilst he was gasping in search of them, Closure moved; Chairman, who is getting well into the saddle, put question with lightning-like rapidity; before Committee quite knew where it was, it was dividing on the Uganda Vote.
Business done.—Supplementary Estimates concluded; Report of Supply agreed to; way cleared for Appropriation Bill.
Tuesday Night.—Henry Fowler explained Parish Council Bill in speech of equal force and lucidity. "Hands all round," as Tennyson said, in applause of speech and approval of Bill. Jesse Collings rather hinted that anything good in measure was conveyed from Ritchie's Bill, and everyone knows that Ritchie was mere lay-figure behind which Jesse controlled policy of Local Government Board under last Administration. Even this criticism meant as compliment. No harsher note disturbed chorus of approval.
Jokim, in effusion of moment, led into making interesting confession. As he says, only he put it stronger, general impression is that he is not particularly attached to Agricultural Labourer. Bobby Spencer, when he made his historic declaration—"Mr. Speaker, Sir, I am not an Agricultural Labourer"—understood to have Jokim in his mind; endeavouring to ingratiate himself with the statesman who, at the time, was Chancellor of Exchequer. Jokim, certainly, through long and honourable career, never lost opportunity of hustling Hodge. Deductions drawn from this attitude entirely erroneous. Only been dissembling his love. Made clean breast of it to-day. Clasping his hands with genuine emotion, tear plainly tickling through his voice, he exclaimed, "It has been the dream of my life to educate the Agricultural Labourer in Parish affairs!"
