CONVERSION À LA MODE.
Scene—A Government Office. A Government Official discovered.
To him enter a Petitioner.
Petitioner. I really think, Sir, that the time has arrived for a grant.
Official. Impossible, my dear Sir, impossible. I can assure you the reports are greatly exaggerated.
Pet. But do you know that the ports cannot properly be guarded without further financial assistance?
Off. Very likely; at least, that may be the general opinion.
Pet. And Science could be far more certain did the funds permit—you are aware of that?
Off. Faddists never consider the cost of anything.
Pet. And I suppose you are aware that it is marching towards the metropolis?
Off. When it gets there it will be time to consider the situation.
Pet. Then you have not heard of the recent affair in Westminster?
Off. In Westminster! Why that is close to the Houses of Parliament!
Pet. And if I tell you that it has been traced to the Lobby of the Commons.
Off. Don't say another word, my dear Sir, not another word. What, appeared in the House of Commons! Why, several millions shall be granted at once!
[Scene closes in upon preparations of the most active character.
Announcement.—The Heavenly Twins has had a success. It will be followed by a treatise on gout by Mrs. Sarah Gamp, M.D., to be entitled The Uneavenly Twinge.