"PERSONALLY CONDUCTED."
'Tis a norrible tale I'm a-going to narrate;
It happened—vell, each vone can fill in the date!
It's a heartrending tale of three babbies so fine.
Whom to spifflicate promptly their foes did incline.
Ven they vos qvite infants they lost their mamma;
They vos left all alone in the vorld vith their pa.
But to vatch o'er his babbies vos always his plan—
(Chorus)—
'Cos their daddy he vos sich a keerful old man!
He took those three kiddies all into his charge,
And kep them together so they shouldn't "go large."
Two hung to his coat-tails along the hard track.
And the third one, he clung to his neck pick-a-back.
The foes of those kiddies they longed for their bleed,
And they swore that to carry 'em he shouldn't succeed,
But to save them poor babbies he hit on a plan—
(Chorus)—
'Cos their dadda he vos sich a artful old man!
Some hoped, from exposure, the kids would ketch cold,
And that croup or rheumatics would lay 'em in the mould;
But they seemed to survive every babbyish disease,
Vich their venomous enemies did not qvite please.
But, in course, sich hard lines did the kiddies no good;
They got vet in the storm, they got lost in the vood,
But their dad cried, "I'll yet save these kids if I can!"—
(Chorus)—
'Cos their feyther he vos sich a dogged old man!
Foes hoped he'd go out of his depth,—or his mind,—
Or, cutting his stick, leave his babbies behind,
Ven they came to the margin of a vide roaring stream.
And the kids, being frightened, began for to scream.
But he cries, cheery like, "Stash that hullabulloo!
Keep your eye on your father, and he'll pull you through!!"—
Vich some thinks he vill do—if any von can—
(Chorus)—
'Cos Sir Villyum he is sich a walliant old man!