BABY'S DIARY.
["The Nursery Tricycle contains two seats, one for the mistress and one for the maid and her charge, and has two pairs of pedals."—Daily Paper.]
This is rather fun! Ever so much better than those crawling old mail-carts and perambulators. Wonder mother and nurse never thought of it before. A pneumatic tandem, too, I notice. Hope they understand blowing tire up again when it bursts.
Nurse a duffer at pedalling. A mere passenger! Have to keep her up to the mark by crying. Frightened a pony in a trap. Sarcastic driver said, "You don't want a bell to your machine with that child yelling like a tom-cat on fire." Gives me a hint—I must see how our cat does yell when it's on fire.
Really, I never saw such steering! Mother has just run us into a brick wall. Disgraceful! Why wasn't she taught tricycling when she was young? Her education has certainly been horribly neglected.
Why should I sit in the middle, though? Can't see the country properly. Make another protest—louder, if possible. Passing pedestrian observes, "You should call your machine a crycycle, not a tricycle." Put out my tongue at him. Nurse offers to give me a "pick-a-back"; says she can pedal too! The old humbug! Scratch her face. Mother offers me a seat on front handle. Not half bad.
Fresh air makes one uncommonly hungry. Time for my bottle. Insist on my outriders stopping at a public for milk. Find the pony, trap, and sarcastic driver stopping there too. Latter says to Mother, "So you've brought the infant phenomenon with you, Ma'am!" Wonder what he means. He adds something about a "fog-horn." Rude, I fancy.
Back homewards. Awfully sleepy after that milk. Curious milk. Perhaps sarcastic person drugged it to quiet me? Fast asleep. Wakened by crash! Stars! Oh, what is it? Try to yell—can't—mouth full of something.
Later. In my cot, thank Heaven! Heard doctor say, "Severe shock, but no bones broken." Awful headache. Seems that break went wrong going down-hill. Well, no "safety tandem" for me again—can't stand 'em, myself, not being in favour of infanticide. Give me a good old mail cart!
