I.—Old Style.

He. Has anyone seen the paper?

She. I haven't.

He. Didn't it come this morning?

She. Very likely not. The boy often forgets it. You're the only person who ever looks at it.

He. Well, I suppose I must wait till I get to the Club; but I dare say there isn't anything that matters in it.

Or

She. Have you done with that paper, my dear?

He. Absolutely; there's nothing in it. There never is. I can't think why we waste money in taking it.

She. Then perhaps I may have it for a pattern?

He. Why, certainly. I've no use for it.

The whole family (all together).Has the paper come yet?
Whats the news?
where's the paper?
What about Liége?
I say, where's the paper?
Isn't the paper here yet?
What's the matter with the people?

Or

The whole family (all together again). I say, father, you might read quicker.
Can't you tear it in half?
Do tell us the news.
Do read it out loud.
What about Liége? Quick!
Oh dear, why don't we have ten copies of it?

"The 'Daily Telegraph' Algeciras correspondent, wiring yesterday, says news from Gibraltar reports a naval fight off the Canaries. One of the latter was sunk and the other captured and brought to Gibraltar."

Liverpool Evening Express.

Our own canary protests indignantly at this treatment of its allies.


In order to be in the very admirable fashion the L.C.C. has decided, we understand, to change the name of Jermyn Street to Jellicoe Lane.