A NORTH SEA CHANTEY.

Jack. "IT'S A LONG, LONG WAIT FOR WILLIAM'S NAVY.
BUT MY HEART'S RIGHT HERE."

Officer. "What in thunder have you been doing all the morning? This leather's not dressed; there's mud on it still!"

Recruit (ex-Cyclist). "Sorry, Sir, but I've spent most of my time polishing the pedals."