An Incisive Beginning.
"Mr. Gordon Hewart, opening the president of the London Chamber of Commerce ..."
The Star.
The Hebdomadal Council of Oxford University have suspended for six months the filling of the Professorship of Modern Greek, the view apparently being that there is no one about just now who understands the modern Greek.
Youthful Patriot. "Take away the night-light, Mary. I'd rather risk the dark than attract a Zeppelin."
"The Rivista Marittima publishes details of a new German ironclad, which is claimed to be totally unsinkable.... It is said to be a Dreadnought-cruiser, fitted with triple skins of armour, stuffed with non-resisting material."—Times.
It sounds like one of our conscientious objectors.
"The albatross—its docility was charming—soon occupied a splendid isolation on the tarpaulined covered hatchway platform.... I shall in future read Keats' 'Ancient Mariner' with an accentuated interest."
Natal Witness.
Coleridge's "Ode to a Nightingale" was rejected as dealing with the wrong bird.
"Young Lady-Attendant for Allies' Rifle Range, to replace one getting married; the 3rd in 12 months doing the same; good remuneration, and comfortable job."—Glasgow Citizen.
Bow and arrow or .303, Cupid's markmanship remains unerring.
"The Man who dined at Krupp's and worked with the Kaiser."
Morning Paper Heading.
The menu at Krupp's is not given, but was probably some form of pig.