THE TALE OF THE TUNEFUL TUB.

["Why do so many people sing in the bathroom?... The note is struck for them by the running water. While the voice sounds resonantly in the bath-room it is not half so fine and inspiring when the song is continued in the dressing-room. The reason is that the furniture of the dressing-room tends to deaden the reverberations."—Prof. W.H. Bragg on "The World of Sound."]

When to my morning tub I go,

With towel, dressing-gown and soap,

Then most, the while I puff and blow,

My soul with song doth overflow

(Not unmelodiously, I hope).

The plashing of the H. and C.

Castalian stimulus affords;

I reach with ease an upper G

And, like the wild swan, carol free

The gamut of my vocal chords.

And when, my pure ablutions o'er,

The larynx fairly gets to work,

Amid the unplugged water's roar

I caper, trolling round the floor,

In tones as rich as Thomas Burke.

But in my dressing-room's retreat

My native wood-notes wilt and sag;

Not there those raptures I repeat;

My bellow now becomes a bleat

(For reasons, ask Professor Bragg).

So, Ruth, if song may find a path

Still through thy heart, be listening by

The bathroom while I take my bath;

But leave before the aftermath,

Nor while I'm dressing linger nigh.

On the acoustic side, I fear,

My chest of drawers is quite a "dud;"

The chairs would silence Chanticleer,

Nor would I have you overhear

When I have lost my collar-stud.