THE LAND OF LOGIC.
Let me tell you about my Nationalist friend, Gabal Osman Effendi.
The circumstances of his brother's death, which were as follows, drove him into politics and made him a fervent advocate of "Egypt for the Egyptians."
His brother was in a very humble way and lived in a little mud village. There he had a friend, yet poorer than himself, who only attained to prosperity when a plague fell on the village. The sanitary authorities put a cordon around it to prevent the spread of the plague, and hired this man among others to throw disinfectants and things into any drains that happened to exist. Thus Osman Effendi's brother's friend became a Government servant.
Now Osman Effendi's brother had a sore leg. When he heard of his friend's new work he thought he saw a way to avoid any doctor's fees. So he went to him and said, "I hear that you are now a doctor." His friend, proud but truthful, said he was perhaps hardly that, but he was certainly put to administer drugs. Osman's brother pointed out that his leg was sore and suggested that it should be healed. The other looked doubtful, then produced a lump of his disinfectant. "This," said he, "is a powerful drug and, who knows? it may cure your leg." It was a friendly act; but Osman's brother swallowed the lump and shortly afterwards died.
Osman Effendi at once brought an action for damages against the Government, on the ground that its servant had caused the death of his brother (whom, as a matter of fact, he himself had largely supported). The case was heard by a Court on which sat two Egyptian judges and one English, and the decision went against Osman. This convinced him of the injustice of the English.
The Assize Court of Appeal, which visited the district and heard Osman Effendi's appeal against the first verdict, consisted of three Egyptian judges. It is true that the English judge who should have gone on Assize had fallen ill, and there was no other to take his place. But Osman Effendi saw in this too the malevolent hand of the English, who nourished a grudge against him. "How," he said, "can I obtain justice if there is no Englishman on the Court?"
From that moment he has become an ultra-Nationalist, and has, I believe, been seen in the streets of Cairo shouting with the best of them the latest "English" catchword of "Long Live Egypt! Long Die Milner!"
He is, you see, an educated man.
Editor (to poet of somewhat dissolute habits who has been paid in advance for contributions which are not forthcoming). "I know you're going to the devil as hard as you can; but you've got to sing as you go."
Consolidating the Empire.
"In honour of the visit to Napier of the Prince of Wales the roof of the Borough Council offices is to be given a coat of paint."—New Zealand Paper.
"PERSONAL.
Arthur.—You idiot.—Irene."—Times.
Very "personal," we should say.
"Sir Auckland and Lady Geddes left London last Saturday for the Untied States."—Irish Paper.
It is only fair to add that they have not chosen this country for the sake of its easy Divorce Laws.
"Major. Christopher Lowther (CUCumberland, North) moved a new clause."—Provincial Paper.
It was somewhere in this neighbourhood, we believe, that Wordsworth discovered his "winsome marrow."
"Though to-day is Primrose Day...."—Daily Mirror, April 12th.
At the risk of being thought behind the times, we ourselves deferred our celebration until April 19th as usual.
