WHEN THE CHESTNUT FLOWERS.
Famous Folk who visit Hampton Court.
(Specially contributed by our mendacious Paragraphical Expert after the best models.)
Wonderful is the lure that Cardinal Wolsey's ancient seat has for all classes of Londoners, especially now when the spires of pink and yellow blossoms rise amidst the dark foliage of Bushey Park, but it is not generally known how many celebrities of the day are attracted to Hampton Court Palace unobserved by anybody but me, who make a habit of noticing this kind of thing. Leaders in the worlds of politics and art wander on the closely-shaven lawns or through the stately chambers, where our English kings made their home and in most cases left their bedsteads behind for posterity to admire. It is as if some irresistible compulsion drove the great minds of the present to commune with the mighty shades of the past. Either that or because the return fare from Waterloo is comparatively cheap.
Paying my penny to visit the Great Vine the other day, I found myself alone in the conservatory with none other than the Chancellor of the Exchequer himself, who was regarding this magnificent specimen of horticulture with evident interest through his monocle. After mentioning to him that its record output was twenty-two hundred clusters, I could not resist the temptation of asking him whether he thought the manufacture of home-grown wines would be stimulated by the provisions of the present Budget. Mr. Chamberlain, however, returned an evasive reply and went out to join Sir Edward Carson, who was pacing up and down in front of the Orangery.
Other well-known politicians whom I have noticed here lately have been Lord Beatty and Lord Fisher strolling arm-in-arm beside the Long Canal, and Mr. Jack Jones looking contemptuously at the Kynge's Beestes; and the other day, owing to identical errors in our choice of routes, I bumped into Sir Eric Geddes no fewer than five times during one afternoon in the Maze. The Lord Chancellor is another frequent visitor. For one who has the mitigation of the harsher features of our marriage laws so much at heart, these Courts, where "bluff King Hal" celebrated so many of his cheeriest weddings, have a special charm. It is true that the eighth Henry was a little one-sided in his ideas of reform, but that was the fault of his age rather than himself, and, like the present National Party, he had, as the Lord Chancellor put it, the great heart of the people behind him.
Nor is it only statesmen who haunt the great palace. Nowhere else but here, where James I.'s company of actors, including William Shakspeare, performed, can Mr. Henry Ainley obtain the requisite atmosphere which inspires his swift variety of impersonations, and I am told that his sudden remark of, "Oh, pardon me, thou bleeding piece of earth," made to one of the attendants who had been for many years in the army, was nearly the cause of a slight fracas. Mr. H. G. Wells has sometimes been seen staring open-mouthed at the painting of the Olympian cosmogony which adorns the ceiling and walls of the Grand Staircase, and in the wych-elm bower Sir J. M. Barrie tells me that he often thinks out the titles of his new plays. It was here, in fact, whilst he was weighing the delicate question, "Why did Alice-Sit-By-the-Fire?" that the sudden happy answer occurred to him, "Because Mary Rose."
P.S.—I forgot to say that Lady Diana Duff-Cooper frequently comes down here. Or, at any rate, if she doesn't, I shall say she does, because I always mention her in my paragraphs.
V.