ANOTHER WAR TO END WAR.
[An address to the League of Nations on learning that it is considering a scheme to tackle the rat plague.]
Not yours to lure the lands of Cross or Crescent
Back from Bellona where she bangs her drum,
Nor make this Hades, anyhow at present,
The New Elysium.
For still the sword gleams mightier than the pen in
Europe, you'll notice, at the Bolshies' beck;
Confess now that the case of Mr. Lenin
Gets you right in the neck.
So I have read with wondrous satisfaction,
Feeling in this your hands are far from tied,
That you propose to emulate the action
Of Hamelin's Piper (Pied).
And, though the task prove hard and ever harder,
From your crusade, I trust, you'll never cease
Till you've restored good-will to every larder
And to each pantry peace.
Then, when the cocksure critic in his crudeness
Pops you the question while his back he pats,
"What have you done?" you'll find at last, thank goodness,
One ready answer—"Rats!"
"Puccinni's three one-act operas, erroneously described as a typtich...."—Evening Paper.
But what about the spelling of "Puccinni"? We fear our contemporary has, after all, been caught triptyching.