RHYMES OF THE UNDERGROUND.

Adolphus Minns resides at Kew

And does what people ought to do.

In boarding trains his instincts are

To "let 'em first get off the car,"

Then "hurry up" himself to enter,

And "pass along right down the centre."

Though nigh his destination be

No selfish "door-obstructor" he:

Rather than bear such imputation

He'll travel on beyond his station.

His unexceptionable ways

E'en liftmen have been known to praise—

A folk censorious and, as such,

Not given to praising over-much.

Small need have they to shout a grim

"No smoking in the lift" at him,

Or ask if he's the only one

For whom the lift is being run.

Adolphus Minns, who lives at Kew,

Does all that people ought to do—

Retires to bed before eleven,

Is up and shaved by half-past seven—

And, when he dies, he'll go to Heaven.

Perhaps he's gone; I've never met

His like at Kew or elsewhere yet.