THE SCHOOLMASTER OF THE FUTURE.
(And the sooner we get him the better.)
British Workman: "BOTHER YOUR 'OLOGIES AND 'OMETRIES, LET ME TEACH HIM SOMETHING USEFUL!"
Seems to me all a muddle all round. Half the Masters are grinders and grabs,
And the men, when not cynical churls, are too apt to be shirkers and blabs.
I don't see it's a lively look out for my mates, in the country or town,
With "Standards" and School-rates still rising, and most other things going down.
Nice thing for the nippers too, ain't it? The boys may be stuffed at both ends,
Without "technical" knowledge they're wasters; them as tells 'em this truth are their friends.
There 'aint no true "Apprentices" now; seven years of sound teaching don't please.
But the masters and workers appear to be sweet upon freedom and ease;
Old "Indentures" are too long and tight, so they just shuffle on and slop through,
And it's diamond cut diamond all round, till Trade seems just a regular do.
I was trained in a different school, and my motto's good work for good wage;
But the sweaters and spouters between 'em spoil that in this book-learned age.
Mister School Teacher just take my tip, I can tell you you're on the wrong lay;
You get paid, so I've heard, by results; the results, Sir, are bad, and don't pay.
Boys learning to read, and then spending their pence upon "Highwaymen" trash;
Lads knowing the pons asinorum, who can't make a door or a sash;
Louts lolloping round on the loose, spouting fragments of Socialist stuff;
Mobs of "workmen," played shuttlecock with by the ranter, the "red," and the rough;
True hands by the thousand left idle, poor mouths by the myriad unfilled,
Because Wealth's so hard upon Labour, and Labour's so often unskilled;
These are rummy "results!" See this lad, now; he's pale; he's well-packed, I suppose
With the stuff that your "Standards" require; well, his schooling must come to a close;
To stuff him, and lots of his like, rate-collectors must put on the screw.
Well, when you have done with the nipper, the question comes, what can he do?
Will his bag of books stand him in stead, when he ought to have tools in his bag?
Are your "Standards" quite up to the mark, if they lead to the Black or Red Flag?
Oh, bother your 'isms and 'ologies! Excellent things in their way;
But bread-winning wants something else, and the 'isms without it won't pay.
Yes—"Technical Knowledge" they call it—means practical gumption and skill,
Or used to when I was a youngster; it may be a sort of a pill,
But if you'll stand aside and let me teach the lad something useful, my friend,
Old England may yet hold her own, which some think a desirable end!