"EMBARRASSING!"

Or, The Political Scipio and the East African Charmer.

"Though the topic of Africa is said to be 'embarrassing and inconvenient,' it need not occasion any uneasiness at all; but if the British Government surrenders any portion of the territory reserved for the sphere of British influence, it may become most terribly embarrassing within a measurable period of time."—Stanley's Reply to Lord Salisbury.

Stanley, loquitur:—

History repeats itself! Perhaps it may do,

But "with a difference." The moral Sages

Think that if anyone holds wisdom, they do;

But not all sense is stored in pedant's pages.

Historic parallels, from Plutarch downwards,

Are rather pretty fancies than realities.

I am no book-worm, have no leanings gownwards.

And set small store by moralist's banalities.

To pose as Scipio, that pudent Roman,

So praised by pedagogue Polybius, seemingly

Pleases a Tory Premier. Well, our foeman

Won't slumber whilst we choose to doze on dreamingly.

Scipio at New Carthage was a hero

Of virgin virtue and high generosity;

But hopes in Africa will fall to zero,

If "policy" means virtuous pomposity.

The chaste Proconsul turned his visage blushingly,

From what with him was personal temptation;

But what's good rule for one will fall quite crushingly

If 'tis adopted by a mighty nation.

Scipio, no doubt, was splendid in his modest

And generous dealings with those Spanish hostages;

But Salisbury-Scipio? Picture of the oddest!

Imperial rule is not all Penny Postages,

Dainty diplomacies, generous concessions

To Teuton tastes and Hohenzollern fancies;

Or faith in bland Caprivi's fine professions,

And wandering Weissmann's roseate romances.

Kilimi-Njaro, Masai-Land, the Congo,

Should satisfy your thirst for abnegation;

And now, methinks, dear Lord, you cannot wrong go,

If you go in for—let's say "exploitation."

Scipio the Elder was not given to letting

The Carthaginians get too much the best of him.

Now on the Teuton it is even betting;

To squeeze you north, or south, or east, or west of him.

Out of the Congo State on the west border,

Out of the Southern Soudan on his north one!

By Jove, my Lord, that seems a biggish order!

To stop it needs some struggle, and 'tis worth one.

That poor East African Company's affronted,

While Iron-clads and soldiers help the Teuton.

Must they then be from the Nyanza shunted,

And must I all their miseries be mute on,

Because plain speech is what you call "embarrassing."

Because unto the Teuton you're so tender?

Must Englishmen in Africa stand harassing,

And stoop to a calm policy of Surrender,

And all that a proud Premier at Hatfield

May play the Scipio—in this feeble fashion?

My Lord, we did not win our spurs in that field.

Upon my soul, it puts me in a passion;

And not me only, but, as you'll discover,

A lot of Englishmen who watch this drama.

Scipio was not an indiscriminate lover,

But it was he licked Hannibal at Zama.

I bring you, Scipio, the East Afric beauty

Captured and chained, but opulent and charming.

You turn away! From sacred sense of duty?

From fear of your (political) virtue harming?

No! Scipio seemed ruled by honour's laws

When to the captured beauty he was lenient,

You turn away, sham Scipio, because

She seems "embarrassing and inconvenient!"