"ROOM FOR A BIG ONE!"
["Mr. Herbert Gladstone, as First Commissioner of Works, informed the House that 'no series of historical personages could be complete without the inclusion of Cromwell,' and though he had no sum at his disposal for defraying the cost of a statue this year, Sir William Harcourt, as Chancellor of the Exchequer, had promised to make the necessary provision in the Estimates for next year."—Spectator.]
Room for the Regicide amongst our Kings? Horrible thought, to set some bosoms fluttering! The whirligig of time does bring some things To set the very Muse of History muttering. Well may the brewer's son, uncouth and rude, Murmur—in scorn—"I hope I don't intrude!"
Room, between Charles the fair and unveracious,— Martyr and liar, made comely by Vandyke,— And Charles the hireling, callous and salacious? Strange for the sturdy Huntingdonian tyke To stand between Court spaniel and sleek hound! Surely that whirligig hath run full round!
Exhumed, cast out!—among our Kings set high! (Which were the true dishonour Noll might question.) The sleek false Stuarts well might shrug and sigh Make room—for him? A monstrous, mad suggestion! O Right Divine, most picturesque quaint craze, How art thou fallen upon evil days!
What will White Rose fanatics say to this? Stuartomaniacs will ye not come wailing; Or fill these aisles with one gregarious hiss Of angry scorn, one howl of bitter railing? To think that Charles the trickster, Charles the droll, Should thus be hob-a-nobbed by red-nosed Noll!
Methinks I hear the black-a-vised one sneer "Ods bobs, Sire, this is what I've long expected! If they had him, and not his statue, here Some other 'baubles' might be soon ejected. Dark Strafford—I mean Salisbury—might loose More than his Veto, did he play the goose.
"He'd find perchance that Huntingdon was stronger Than Leeds with all its Programmes. Noll might vow That Measure-murder should go on no longer; And that Obstruction he would check and cow. Which would disturb Macallum More's composure; The Axe is yet more summary than the Closure!
"As for the Commons—both with the Rad 'Rump' And Tory 'Tail' alike he might deal tartly. He'd have small mercy upon prig or pump; I wonder what he'd think of B-wl-s and B-rtl-y? Depend upon it, Noll would purge the place Of much beside Sir Harry and the Mace."
Your Majesties make room there—for a Man! Yes, after several centuries of waiting, It seems that Smug Officialism's plan A change from the next Session may be dating. You tell us, genial Herbert Gladstone, that you May find the funds, next year, for Cromwell's Statue!
Room for a Big One! Well the Stuart pair May gaze on that stout shape as on a spectre. Subject for England's sculptors it is rare To find like that of England's Great Protector; And he with bigot folly is imbued, Who deems that Cromwell's Statute can intrude!
"ROOM FOR A BIG ONE!"
Cromwell. "Now then, your Majesties, I hope I don't intrude!"