SIBTHORPS CORNER.
If old Nick were to lose his tail, where should he go to supply the deficiency?—To a gin-palace, because there they re-tail bad spirits.
Mr. G., who has a very ugly wife, named Euphemia, was asked lately why his spouse was the image of himself—and, to his great annoyance, discovered that it was because she was his Effie-G22. I could make better than the above myself. E.G.—In what way should Her Majesty stand upon a Bill in Parliament so as to quash it?—By putting her V-toe (veto) on it.—PRINTER’S DEVIL..
I floored Ben-beau D’Israeli the other day with the following:—“Ben,” said I, “if I were going to buy a violin, what method should I take to get it cheap?” Benjie looked rather more foolish than usual, and gave it up. “Why, you ninny,” I replied, “I should buy an ounce of castor-oil, and then I would get a phial in (violin).” I think I had him there.
Why is a female of the canine species suckling her whelps like a philosophic principle?—Because she is a dogma (dog-ma).
What part of a horse’s foot is like an irate governor?—The pastern (pa-stern).
Why is the march of a funeral procession like a turnpike?—Because it is a toll-gait (toll-gate).
Who is the greatest literary star?—The poet-aster.
Why is an Israelite named William Solomons similar to a great public festival?—Because he is a Jubilee (Jew-Billy).
Why are polished manners like a pea-jacket?—Because they are address (a dress).
Why are swallows like a leap head-over-heels?—Because they are a summer set (a somerset).