A Dangerous Title.
(To Mr. Joseph Hatton, Author of "Cigarette Papers.")
Cigarette Papers, JOSEPH, when properly stuffed,
Are meant, I suppose, to be zealously puffed.
When we take them in hand, a consuming desire
Attacks us to set the gay trifles on fire.
Yet, the brand being good (here's the point of my joke),
They are always enjoyed ere they vanish in smoke.
FROM AN X.J.P. TO LORD CHIEF JUSTICE PUNCH.—Sir,—Why complain of "the Licence of the Bar?" Of course it goes with, and is a part of, every Licence to a Public-house granted by the Middlesex Magistrates. I've retired some years myself, am a bit deaf, and don't read much; but I heard just enough to warrant me in writing to you at once on what appears to me so simple a matter.
ROBERT SHALLOW, X.J.P., M.M.
At the Sign of the Pig and Pippin.
TO THE FUTURE A.R.A.—Better luck next time, Mr. SWAN. Be satisfied that, though at present unelected, you are Swan, R.A., i.e., Rara Avis. As you can plume yourself on this, so "in hoc Cygno, vinces!" Which we caninecally and not canonically for the nonce nonce-sensically render, "In this (matter), to the Swan (we say) you will (go in and) win!"
NOTICE.—Rejected Communications or Contributions, whether MS., Printed Matter, Drawings, or Pictures of any description, will in no case be returned, not even when accompanied by a Stamped and Addressed Envelope, Cover, or Wrapper. To this rule there will be no exception.