THE FORCE OF EXAMPLE.
(A Story of Adventure not in the least Likely to be True.)
"Do you see what RITCHIE has been doing?" asked the Secretary of State for War of one of his colleagues.
"If you mean visiting the Casual Wards, after attending a meeting in the East End of London, I do," replied the Home-Secretary. "An excellent idea, no doubt, suggested by that old story of the Amateur Casual, which appeared some twenty or thirty years ago in the columns of an evening paper."
"But don't you think it is playing it a little low?" suggested the First Lord of the Admiralty.
"Well, I don't know," returned the Autocrat of the W.O. "After all, there is nothing like personal experience."
And then all three were silent, lost in profound consideration. Shortly afterwards they bade one another adieu, declaring that they had greatly enjoyed their Cabinet Council.
It was some hours later that a soldier, wearing the uniform of the Guards, appeared at the Wellington Barracks, and requested that he might be permitted to undertake a spell of "sentry go." He was not known by the Non-commissioned Officer on duty, but as his papers appeared to be correct, permission was given him to act as substitute for Private SMITH, who was next on the roster.
And about the same time a person, wearing the garb of a convict, made his way to one of Her Majesty's Prisons, and requested an interview with the Governor. His garb obtained for him immediate admission to the precincts of the gaol.
"Well, my man," said the Governor, when his visitor appeared before him; "what do you want?"
"If you please, Sir," replied the person in the garb of a convict, "I shall be very much obliged if you will permit me to have an hour or so at oakum-picking."
"Absolutely impossible," replied the Crown Official, "such luxuries are only allowed to individuals who have been properly introduced to us by a Judge and Jury."
"I fancied," returned the wearer of the felon's garb, "that an order from the Home-Secretary would smooth all difficulties."
"Certainly," admitted the Governor, "but such documents are only supplied to European Royal Personages, or other foreigners of extreme distinction."
"I have the requisite document," replied the curiously-garbed stranger, and he was bowed into a well-appointed cell, and furnished with the tangled rope for which he had petitioned.
And about the same time a sea-faring man applied to be rated on one of Her Majesty's Ships of War.
"Impossible!" was the immediate reply of the Captain, who was rather short-tempered.
"Nothing is impossible to the Admiralty," said the sea-faring man; "and, if you will glance at this paper, you will see that I have special permission from Whitehall to be mast-headed, or to undertake some other naval manoeuvre of a more modern date."
Suppressing an exclamation of a somewhat profane character, the Captain gave the required permission, and a few minutes later the sea-faring man was mounting (with some difficulty), the quivering rungs of a rope-ladder.
A few hours after the happening of these events, a weary soldier, a half-starved convict, and a sailor covered with bruises, met by chance in the common room of a tavern. For some minutes they were too exhausted to speak. At length, the convict declared that the organisation of Her Majesty's Prisons was simply perfect.
"I greatly doubt it," replied the soldier; "but I can insist with truth, that nothing can possibly equal the admirable condition of the Queen's Barracks."
"I don't for a moment believe it," put in the sea-faring man; "but I am prepared to swear that the arrangements of the Admiralty could not possibly be better."
"Very likely," sneered the convict; "and no doubt they could not be worse!"
Upon this the three men began quarrelling and boasting of the merits of the institutions they had recently visited.
"Pardon me," at length observed the convict, "but I have had some legal training, and it seems to me that you are both gentlemen of great discernment. Nay, more, I should imagine that your education is greatly in excess of that possessed by men of the same standing in the professions you appear to have adopted."
"Not unlikely," replied the soldier, smilingly removing his disguise; "because I happen to be the Secretary of State for War."
"And I," said the sailor, following suit, and emerging from his sea-faring garb, which now was found to be covering an official uniform—"And I am the First Lord of the Admiralty."
Before the two Ministers could recover from their surprise, the wearer of the convict's garb had also divested himself of a part of his costume, and the whole of his "make-up."
"You see you need not be ashamed of my company," he observed, with a smile, "as I am the Home-Secretary."
Then the three Ministers laughed, and each one of them insisted that his particular branch of the Government Service was better than the branches of his colleagues.
"Let us change costumes," suggested the Home-Secretary, "and try for ourselves. I will become a soldier, you can appear as a convict, and subsequently we might make a further alteration, and allow our friend of the Admiralty to try some oakum-picking." But both the First Lord and the Secretary of State raised objections.
"And yet," urged the Home-Secretary, "I do not think you would find much difference between oakum-picking and sentry-go, and a plank-bed and a hammock on board a torpedo-boat have each great claim to points of similarity."
"We readily believe you," replied the representative of the War Office, "and therefore further test is unnecessary."
"Quite so," added the greatest living authority on Naval matters; "and thus I think we can conveniently leave further personal investigation to such enthusiasts as Mr. RITCHIE and his Private Secretary." And so, perfectly satisfied with the result of their peregrinations, the Ministers again bade one another adieu, and, this time, finally separated.
