No. 1.—"LITTLE MISS MUFFIT."
Little Miss MUFFIT
Reposed on a tuffet,
Consuming her curds and whey—
She had dozens of dolls,
And some cash in Consols
Put by for a rainy day.
But though calm and content
While she drew Three per Cent.,
The Conversion unsettled her mien,
And she said, "Though they've thrown us
This Five-Shilling Bonus,
I cannot brook Two pounds fifteen!"
Comes a Broker outsider—
Who chanced to have spied her,
And "Options" and "Pools" he extols—
When he pictures the profit
(Commission small off it),
She cheerfully sells her Consols.
Then she starts operations
With fierce speculations
In Stocks of all manner and shape;
But whatever she chooses
Her "cover" she loses,
And sees it run off on the tape.
So alas! for Miss MUFFIT—
She now has to rough it,
And never gets jam with her tea;
While the Bucket-shop Dealer
Employs a four-wheeler,
Regardless of L. S. and D.