THE LAND OF THE (RATHER TOO) FREE.
SCENE—The Landing-Stage of an English Port.
Custom-House Officer (through an interpreter). Do you speak English?
Emigrant (ditto). No.
Cust.-H. Off. (as before). Have you any money?
Emi. (ditto). Not a kopeck.
Cust.-H. Off. Where do you come from?
Emi. Polish Russia.
Cust.-H. Off. Have you any family?
Emi. A sick wife and eight sick children.
Cust.-H. Off. Do any of you know a trade?
Emi. None of us.
Cust.-H. Off. Are you well enough to work?
Emi. No.
Cust.-H. Off. Have you any friends in England?
Emi. Don't know a soul.
Cust.-H. Off. Have you any luggage?
Emi. Only the Cholera!
A COMPENDIOUSLY GRAMMATICAL TREE.—A Yew Tree. First it may be a 'Igh Tree, but it is a Yew Tree. It is either a He Tree or a She Tree. If small, it represents the first person plural by being a "Wee Tree:" the second person plural is the Manager and Manageress of the Haymarket, "Ye Trees;" and the third person plural would be expressed by a Devonshire Gardener indicating this talented couple as "They Trees."