TO A DROSHKY-DRIVER.
(By a Quondam Fare.)
Here's a health to you, Gospodin Ivánoff—
Or whatever your name may chance to be—
Of vodka I'll toss you a full stakán off
(A tumbler, I mean, of eau de vie);
And I'll sing you fortissimo con furore
Your national hymn, in a cheerful key,
('Twill colour with local tone my story,
To start with your "Bozhe Tsaryá khrani").
'Twas a lively morning, my hirsute Jehu,
In Petersburg once we together spent;
And now in my sketch-book I still can see you
(The annexed for your portrait's humbly meant).
Your costume resembled in part a butcher's—
A dull blue gown of a vast extent,
With top-boots, like each of the other kutschers
And shocking bad hat, all "bashed" and bent.
Ere long you called me your "little brother,"
Or else—your knowledge of Court to show—
(What one Russian "High Excellence" styles another)
"Vuisókoprevoskhodítelstvo."
You wanted to learn how to greet an acquaintance
In English; I said, to be comme il faut,
That "God save the Queen" was the proper sentence—
I own that my hoax was a trifle low.
A large percentage, my gay izvostchik,
I failed of your jokes to understand;
But I safely say you displayed the most cheek
Of any I've met by sea or land.
When you pitched me clean out on the Nevski pavement,
With syllable brief I loudly banned;
But as dam in your lingo "I'll give" (you knave!) meant,
You grinned, and for "tea-money" held your hand.
I shall never forget that awful jolting
I got as you whirled me round about
In your backless car; for your bumping, bolting,
You really, my Vanka, deserved the knout.
Well, I won't say "Good-bye," but "Do svidanya"—
Though whether we'll meet again I doubt;
If you ever should wander to far Britannia,
I fear you will probably find me "Out."
Motto for Professors of Palmistry.— "Palmam qui meruit ferat." i.e., "Who has paid his money may bare his palm."
It is proposed to establish a fire-station, "with fifty men, on the Thames Embankment." For what purpose? In case of anybody setting the Thames on Fire?
Mrs. R. says she never has toast for breakfast, but always "fresh-airated bread."