TACTLESS TACTICS.

Were I a burglar in the dock

With every chance of doing time,

With Justice sitting like a rock

To hear a record black with crime;

If my conviction seemed a cert,

Yet, by a show of late repentance,

I thought I might, with luck, avert

A simply crushing sentence;—

I should adopt, by use of art,

A pensive air of new-born grace,

In hope to melt the Bench's heart

And mollify its awful face;

I should not go and run amok,

Nor in a fit of senseless fury

Punch the judicial nose or chuck

An inkpot at the jury.

So with the Hun: you might assume

He would exert his homely wits

To mitigate the heavy doom

That else would break him all to bits;

Yet he behaves as one possessed,

Rampaging like a bull of Bashan,

Which, as I think, is not the best

Means of conciliation.

For when the wild beast, held and bound,

Ceases to plunge and rave and snort,

The Bench, I hope, will pass some sound

Remarks on this contempt of court;

The plea for mercy, urged too late,

Should prove a negligible cipher,

And when the sentence seals his fate

He'll get at least a lifer.

O.S.