From a Cadets' examination:
"Q. What is a Roster?
A. A Roster is a soldier who frequently gets drunk or rowdy. Not what could be called a steady man."
From a Publishers' advertisement:—
Wild Foods of Great Britain: Where to Find them and How to Cook them. 46 figs. Post free 1s. 9d."
The figs alone are worth the money.
"Leytonstone's best effort was by a wounded soldier, who at great risk of pneumonia gallantly rescued a number of women from a tramcar that couldn't swim."—Daily Sketch.
The attention of the L.C.C. is respectfully called to this deficiency on the part of its vehicle.
"A vessel of 30,000 tons may be sunk, but on the percentage table, such as the Admiralty serves up to us, she occupies the same relative position as a one-ton yawl returning with a load of kippers."—Mr. E. Ashmead-Bartlett in "The Sunday Times."
Inquiries as to the locality of the kipper fishing-grounds should be addressed to our contemporary. We ourselves hear that it is in the neighbourhood of the fried whitings.
Anxious voice (from motor-launch). "I SAY, CAN YOU TELL ME EXACTLY WHERE I AM?"
Commander of destroyer. "YES, DEAR OLD THING. YOU'RE IN THE NORTH SEA."