DAVID IN RHONDDALAND.

DAVID. "I'M OFTEN AWAY FROM HOME. HOW DO I GET SUGAR?"

THE MAD GROCER. "YOU DON'T; YOU FILL UP A FORM."

DAVID. "BUT I HAVE FILLED UP A FORM."

THE MAD GROCER. "THEN YOU FILL UP ANOTHER FORM."


Friend (to Cinema Commissionaire, who has received notice). "I'M SERPRISED YOU'RE LEAVIN'. I THOUGHT YOU WAS A FIXTURE 'ERE."

Commissionaire. "IS ANYBODY A FIXTURE IN THESE TIMES? LOOK AT THE TSAR OF RUSSIA, TINO, TIRPITZ, AND THE REST OF 'EM."