TWO VIEWS.

There was a high priest of illusion

Who rose by his leader's extrusion;

By way of amends

He invites his old friends

To extinguish their prospects by Fusion.

There was a great foe of delusion,

Who came to the honest conclusion

That Socialist Labour

Plays beggar-my-neighbour

And sought to defeat it by Fusion.

A Leap-Year Record.

"Cambridge University Sports.—H.M. Abrahams winning the long jump with a distance of 22yds. to his credit."—Picture Paper.

"THE PREMIER AND HIS FUTURE.

whither goeth thou?"

Headings in Daily Paper.

Answer adjudged correct: "I knowest not."

'Wanted, a Horse for its keep. Excellent cuisine."—The Times of Ceylon.

À la cart, we presume.

"A roof garden for cats is included in the scheme for the extension of the premises of Our Dumb Friends' League."—Evening Paper.

We have heard the nocturnal cat on the tiles called many names, but never a "dumb friend."

"The Police announce that dogs without dollars found wandering after 10 p.m. are liable to be destroyed."—Hong Kong Paper.

We understand, however, that in China dogs are almost invariably provided with taels.

"Clothes, my dear! Don't mention clothes. You ought to be in the fish line, Why, I runs through a set o' furs in about a month!"