"MY LAWYER."
[Crown 8vo., 6s. 6d., MY LAWYER: A Concise Abridgment of, and Popular Guide to, the Laws of England. By a Barrister-at-Law.]
Who was it, when I thought I saw
In something I had signed a flaw,
Gave me my first distaste for law?
My Lawyer.
Who, when into his hands I fell,
As I my grievance tried to tell,
Around me wove some fatal spell?
My Lawyer.
Who from my mind at once all trace
Of doubt and fear did quite efface,
And made me think I had a "case"?
My Lawyer.
Who of all obstacles made light,
And, whether I was wrong or right,
Insisted that I ought to fight?
My Lawyer.
Who, as I saw the costs increase,
And wished to come to terms of peace,
Declined to let the turmoil cease?
My Lawyer.
Who daily plagued me more and more,
And every time I passed his door
Charged me straight off thirteen-and-four?
My Lawyer.
Who, liking not his little games,
When I resolved to waive my claims,
Quick added fuel to the flames?
My Lawyer.
Who, though some compromise I sought,
And did not wish the matter fought,
Before a jury had it brought?
My Lawyer.
Who, though at last I got enraged,
The battle still more stoutly waged,
And leading Counsel, three, engaged?
My Lawyer.
Who, when, of course, my case went wrong,
Because it wasn't worth a song,
Sent in a bill twelve pages long?
My Lawyer.
And who, now that I'm wiser grown,
And to this book for aid have flown,
Would still on me inflict his own?
My Lawyer.
Yet now, spite all his legal tricks,
Henceforth this work, price six-and-six,
Shall promptly be, in every fix,
My Lawyer.
