The Oriental Mule.
A SKELETON DRAMA IN FOUR ACTS, BY D. BOSSYCOW, ESQ.
[Managers who purchase this great sensation have the right to substitute any other title, to suit their special tastes, abilities or otherwise. Also to fill up the list of characters, ditto, ditto, ditto.]
CHARACTERS (absolutely necessary.)
CLEONI A Young Man in Love.
LUCY A do. Woman do, do.
GIMFRISKY Prince of Eareigh.
ACT I.
Room in a Cottage.
CLEONI. Ah! Oh! my beloved, 'tis well!
LUCY. Hush! no more. I see it all.
CLEONI. Cans't thou see my mother?
LUCY. I cannest.
(They suddenly rush into each other's arms, where they remain in two swoons; in the meanwhile the cottage is burned to the ground. Curtain falls for two minutes, and upon its rising the Ninth Regiment is discovered en bivouac on the ruins, its commander, the PRINCE, reclining gracefully on the ground.)
(Background, river Amazin, mouth wide open.) Solo on the banjo, "Rest, Traveller, Rest," by PAREPA ROSA.
ACT II.
Room in hotel at San Francisco.
GIMFRISKY. Revenge? Aye, 'tis sweet. But see! they come!
LUCY. How now? But yesterday you said—
CLEONI. Hush, dearest, the time will come when—
(A rumbling noise is heard, and soon the whole building is shaken into remarkably small ruins.)
[Half an hour is supposed to elapse, for refreshments, and when the curtain rises, GIMFRISKY, who has emerged through a diminutive hole, is discovered in the costume of AJAX defying the lightning, or something of that sort, singing—
"I dreamt I dwelt in marble, O," "From quarries near to Tuckahoe.">[
ACT III.
Steamer on the Sound.
LUCY. How keiyind it was to give us free passes to our cottage by the sea.
CLEONI. I don't see it in that light.
LUCY. But when once more—
Enter GIMFRISKY, singing, "Will you come into my parlor, my pretty little fly?"
[Here the stage simultaneously opens, and the noble steamer sinks out of sight, leaving only the top of one of the smoke-pipes in view, from which emerges BILLY BIRCH, who sings to slow and solemn music:
"Down, down, down, Derry down," "Tho' lost to sight, to memory dear.">[
ACT IV.
At the base of Mount Vesuvius.
Enter the PRINCE of EAREIGH, heavily enveloped in an elegant black velvet opera cloak.
GIMFRISKY. They think they have eluded me, and although this is a hard place to make a corner, I'll be—
LUCY. What a beautiful—(LUCY and CLEONI having entered, R.H.)
CLEONI. Yes, here will we dwell until—But what form is that?
[The PRINCE here throws off the aforesaid black velvet opera cloak, and appears in a dress somewhat à la Sing Sing and Charlestown, to wit, one-half in an Admiral's uniform, the other half being that of a military officer.]
GIMFRISKY. My dear friends, I have no refreshments here to offer you, but I will show you the crater, if you will follow me.
LUCY. Lead on, thou gay and festive youth.
CLEONI. This gittin' up is somewhat rugged—
GIMFRISKY. Aye, but I'm used to that kind of business; but here we are at the top.
[At this moment an awful eruption takes place, and all are enveloped in smoke. Soon this clears away, and above the crater appear two huge paws, holding the PRINCE head downwards, while LUCY and CLEONI may be seen in loving embrace, sitting under a balloon, and steering due West.]
Epilogue by C. SUMNER, Esq.,—"Sweet are the uses of adversity."
Curtain falls to slow and solemn music.