TOO MANY LEGS.
Senator Elsberg of New York was talking in Albany about a notoriously untruthful man.
"Like all great liars," said Senator Elsberg, "he is careless. He fails to keep accurate note of all the lies he tells. Hence innumerable contradictions, innumerable stories that won't hold together."
Senator Elsberg smiled.
"The average chronic liar," he said, "has the luck of a boy I know who enlisted and went to the Philippines. This boy, whenever he wanted money, would write home from Manila something like this:
"'Dear Father—I have lost another leg in a stiff engagement, and am in hospital without means. Kindly send two hundred dollars at once.'
"To the last letter of this sort that the boy wrote home, he received the following answer:
"'Dear Son—As, according to your letters, this is the fourth leg you have lost, you ought to be accustomed to it by this time. Try and hobble along on any others you may have left.'"—Boston Herald.