Reasonable.
Postmaster—The letter is too heavy; it wants another stamp.
Countrywoman—Why, that will make it heavier still!
—Humoristische.
Actors may have no end of animosities in private life, but they always make up before they appear on the stage.
—Greenville Advocate.
Bromley—Why, Digsby, what's the matter? you look chilled.
Digsby—Right you are, deah boy, the fact is, I attended a social the other evening and everything they served was iced.
By H. C. R.
Dakota has a town named Patronage. Patronage is generally considered a good thing out of which to make capital.
—Boston Transcript.
"Men who have anything in their heads find plenty to do with their hands."—J. Howard, Jr., in N. Y. Press. That's so. We saw a tramp the other day who evidently had something in his head, and both hands were in use.
Jones' better half had presented him with twins. When nurse brought them into the room for inspection the poor man was so bewildered at the multitudinous character of his happiness that he asked: "Am I to choose?"
—Judge.
A Chicago man tried to commit suicide by perforating his head with a bullet. The bullet passed through his skull all right, but did not touch the brain. Before a man goes gunning for his own brains, he ought to acquire the requisite skill by practicing at a pea in a peck measure for a time.
—Binghamton Republican.