The Duties of Kin
The funeral ceremonies provide the greatest number of examples of kinship duties, the parts taken by many of the mourners being determined largely by their bonds of kinship to the deceased. The place of chief mourner is taken by the brother or son of a dead man, by the husband of a dead woman, and by the father of a dead child, though, at the funeral of a girl, the husband plays the most important rôle.
Various duties fall to relatives of the same clan or of the same family of the clan. The earth-throwing at the funeral of a male, the smearing of butter on the buffalo, lighting the pyre at the first funeral and the two fires at the azaramkedr, and ringing the bell at the final scene, are all performed by near relatives of the same clan and family as the deceased.
Cutting off a lock of hair and mixing food are acts performed by the chief mourner, who is of the same clan as the deceased, whether brother, son, husband, or father.
The manmokh, or sister’s son (who may be also son-in-law), has certain definite duties. Formerly, when many buffaloes were killed, one was always given by the sister’s son, and he still gives a thread cord, called pennar. Many other relatives give these cords, but that given by the manmokh is especially [[499]]honoured in that it is put round the body of the dead man inside his cloak, and not merely laid on the covering of the body as are the others.
The mun does not appear to have any duties at a funeral, though in old days he contributed a buffalo, and, at the present time, one of the two buffaloes slaughtered may be given by the mun or other representative of the mother’s family.
The matchuni (child of a maternal uncle or of a paternal aunt) has several duties, of which the most important are those at the irsankati ceremony of the azaramkedr. The other duties are the secondary result of the marriage regulation which makes the matchuni the natural bridegroom or bride, and, in consequence, it is the matchuni who performs the pursütpimi ceremony at the funeral of an unmarried girl. Similarly, the matchuni may take the place of a paiol at the cloth-giving ceremony.
The duties which have, however, the greatest social interest are those performed by the relatives by marriage. At the funeral of a woman certain ceremonies, such as that in which leaves of the tiveri plant are put in the dead woman’s armlet, the urvatpimi ceremony for an unmarried girl, rubbing the relics, lighting the fire at the azaramkedr, and burning the funeral hut, should be performed by the daughter-in-law of a woman or the mother-in-law of a girl. These relatives are, however, of the same clan as the deceased, owing to the fact that a woman becomes a member of the same clan as her husband; and I am therefore doubtful how far these relatives perform the duties in question as members of the same clan, and how far as relatives by marriage. Some of the duties, such as lighting the funeral fires, are done by men of the same clan at the funeral of men; and I am therefore inclined to believe that they are performed by a woman for this reason and not because she is mother-in-law or daughter-in-law, but this point is one which must remain indefinite with our present information.
Similarly the duty of covering the head is a little difficult to understand. The head of a widower is covered (see p. [365]) by one of his paiol—his father-in-law or his brother-in-law—and in this case it is clearly a duty which falls to a relative by [[500]]marriage, but the head of a widow is covered by her own father or by someone of his clan who takes his place. The plausible explanation appears to be that the covering is performed by the father of the woman, not as father of the widow, but as father-in-law of the dead man.
Those who have married into the family of the deceased, the paiol, have to make certain contributions towards the outlay for the funeral, and it is in connexion with one of these contributions that the interesting ceremony of cloth-giving occurs.
The essential feature of the ceremony seems to be that a cloth passes between a relative or representative of the dead person and those who have married into the family of the dead person, and the ceremony involves a money payment to the family of the dead person from those who have married into the family. The ceremony is one which links the funeral ceremonies to those of marriage.
In other ceremonies of the Todas the parts played by different kin are far less conspicuous. The mun or mother’s brother has, however, several important functions. To him falls the duty of naming a child, on which occasion he has also to give a calf. He takes the chief part in the tersamptpimi ceremony, in which he cuts the hair of the child with a special ritual. In the ear-piercing ceremony the maternal uncle pierces one ear, and in the special case of which I have a record, he gave two buffaloes towards the expenses attendant on the ceremony.
It is probable that a girl is named by her mumi, or father’s sister, but this is a point on which I am not quite sure.
Under certain conditions matchuni, when associated together, have to perform certain ceremonial acts. When two male matchuni eat rice and milk together, they must first ask each other, “pa tòr tinkina?” “Milk food shall I eat?” and if they eat honey together, they must say “tein tinkina?” Two female matchuni eating together must also use these formulæ, but they are not said when a man is eating in company with his female matchuni, though possibly the two would never actually eat at the same time.
Male matchuni have also to go through a ceremony when [[501]]they pass in company over either of the two sacred rivers of the Todas, the Paikara (Teipakh) and the Avalanche (Pakhwar). As the two men approach the river, they pluck and chew some grass, and each man says to the other “pò tûdrikina, pò kudrikina?”—“Shall I throw the river (water), shall I cross the river?” or, instead of the second sentence, they may say “pò pûkhkina?”—“Shall I enter the river?” They then go to the side of the river and each man dips his hand in the water and throws a handful away from him three times and then they cross the river, each with the right arm outside the cloak as is usual when crossing these sacred streams.
If the matchuni cross on a Tuesday, Friday or Saturday[2] they do not throw water, but are content with chewing the grass, and if the funeral ceremonies of a person belonging to the clan of either are not complete the water will not be thrown.
This ceremony performed by matchuni when crossing a sacred river was said to be connected with the legend given on p. [592], in which two matchuni are concerned. [[502]]
[2] Properly the river should not be crossed at all on these days (see p. [418]). [↑]
CHAPTER XXII
MARRIAGE
The custom of infant marriage is well established among the Todas, and a child is often married when only two or three years of age. When a man wishes to arrange a marriage for his son, he chooses a suitable girl, who should be, and very often is, the matchuni of the boy, the daughter of his mother’s brother or of his father’s sister. The father visits the parents of the girl, and if the marriage is satisfactorily arranged he returns home after staying for the night at the village. A few days later the father takes the boy to the home of his intended wife. They take with them the loin-cloth called tadrp as a wedding gift and the boy performs the kalmelpudithti salutation to the father and mother of the girl, and also to her brothers, both older and younger than himself, and then gives the tadrp to the girl. Father and son stay for one night at the girl’s village and return home on the following morning. Sometimes the girl returns with them to the village of her future husband, but, much more commonly, she remains at her own home till she is fifteen or sixteen years of age.
If a man has not been married in childhood he may undertake the arrangement of his marriage himself, and visit the parents of the girl unaccompanied by his father; and in this case the girl may at once join her husband if she is old enough.
From the time of the child-marriage the boy has to give a tadrp twice a year until the girl is ten years old, when its place is taken by a putkuli. The tadrp which is given at first is very small, worth perhaps only four annas, but as the girl [[503]]becomes older it is expected that the garment shall become larger and more valuable.
If any member of the girl’s family should die it is expected that the boy’s family shall on each occasion give a sum of eight annas or a rupee. This gift is called tinkanik panm ûtpimi, or “we give a piece of money to the purse.”
Formerly the boy’s family had also to contribute one of the buffaloes killed at the funeral, but this custom is now obsolete. The contribution of buffaloes and money from the boy to his parents-in-law is called pödri. The boy has to take part in a ceremony at the funeral in which a cloth is laid on the dead body, and with this ceremony there is associated a further gift of one rupee, paid to the relatives of the dead person by the family of the boy who has married into the family of the deceased (see p. [358]).
Certain ceremonies are performed shortly before the girl reaches the age of puberty. One is called putkuli tâzâr utiti, or “mantle over he puts,” in which a man belonging to the Tartharol if the girl is Teivali, and to the Teivaliol if she is Tarthar, comes in the day-time to the village of the girl and lying down beside her puts his mantle over her so that it covers both and remains there for a few minutes.
Fourteen or fifteen days later a man of strong physique, who may belong to either division and to any clan, except that of the girl, comes and stays in the village for one night and has intercourse with the girl. This must take place before puberty, and it seemed that there were few things regarded as more disgraceful than that this ceremony should be delayed till after this period. It might be a subject of reproach and abuse for the remainder of the woman’s life, and it was even said that men might refuse to marry her if this ceremony had not been performed at the proper time.
It is usually some years later, when the girl is about fifteen or sixteen, that she joins her husband and goes to live with him at his village. The parents of the husband announce that they will fetch the girl on a certain day, which must be one of two or three days of the week,[1] different for each clan. The husband, accompanied by his father and a male [[504]]relative of the same clan, goes to the village of the girl, and the three are feasted with rice and jaggery. The husband puts five rupees into the pocket of the girl’s mantle and then takes her home. There is no ceremony of any kind, not even the salutation such as was performed at the original ceremony.
If the youth does not wish to live with the girl when the time arrives, he may annul the marriage by giving one buffalo as a fine (kwadr) to the girl’s parents; but, on the other hand, the parents of the girl have to return as many buffaloes as he may have given as pödri at funeral ceremonies.
If the girl refuses to join her husband the fine is heavier, and at the present time usually amounts to five or ten buffaloes, the number being settled by a council according to the circumstances of the people. The girl’s family must also return any buffaloes given as pödri. According to Harkness the fines were in his day much heavier; three buffaloes when the man annulled the marriage, and as many as fifty when this was done by the woman (see p. [538]), and the Todas acknowledge that the fine for refusing to fulfil the marriage contract is now lighter than it used to be.
When a girl goes to join her husband she may be given clothing or ornaments by her parents or brothers, and their gifts are known as adrparn or dowry, but I could not learn that there were any definite regulations prescribing what should be given. It seemed also that occasionally buffaloes might be given as adrparn.