§ 179
Freud in his paper on the love life already referred to[26] makes the observation that there is a type of “love” in a certain class of men in which the man seems to prefer as his loved one a woman who is at least nominally possessed by another man. His attentions to her are carried on as if he were rescuing her from some oppressor. In extreme instances he often professes to be solicitous for her virtue, which consists in his eyes only in not being used by the other man. Freud continues that the other man from whom this type of lover wishes to rescue the woman represents this lover’s own father, the woman his mother, and he himself is the little boy in the original family triangle where the son, according to Freud, is always jealous of the father and continually trying to get his mother away from the father. The “love” type here described is another instance of the compulsion to repeat, referred to in his book Beyond the Pleasure Principle.
It should be the privilege of the husband to sweep away all egoistic-social inhibitions. He should see to it that his actions throughout his married life are such that his wife makes to him the total surrender here implied. If he does not, he has not taken all the steps he might, to render his marriage absolutely happy.