A SOLDIER’S AGE.
Napoleon, in his Italian successes, took a Hungarian battalion prisoners. The colonel, an old man, complained bitterly of the French mode of fighting—by rapid and desultory attacks, on the flank, the rear, the lines of communication, &c., concluding by saying, “that he fought in the army of Maria Theresa.”
“You must be old?” said Napoleon.
“Yes, I am either sixty or seventy.”
“Why, colonel, you have certainly lived long enough to know how to count years a little more closely?”
“General,” said the Hungarian, “I reckon my money, my shirts, and my horses; but as for my years, I know that nobody will want to steal them, and that I shall never lose one of them!”
COUNSELS AND CAUTIONS
By Dr. A. Hunter.
Beware!
Leave your purse and watch at home when you go to the playhouse or an auction room.
Travelling.
When you take a journey in winter put on two shirts; you will find them much warmer than an additional waistcoat.
Building Repairs.
If you mean to buy a house that you intend to alter and improve, be sure to double the tradesman’s estimate.
Your Staircase.
Paint the steps a stone colour; it will save scouring and soap.
Housekeeping.
If you are in trade keep no more houses than you can support; a summer-house and a winter-house have forced many a man into a poor-house.
Enough should suffice.
A man who has obtained a competency, and ventures upon a speculation that may be capable of consuming all that he has already got, stakes ease and comfort against beggary and disgrace.
Loquacity.
A gossip has no home.