Still, I must make some disposition of myself, for if the reader is allowed to suppose me still perambulating over the world with the inevitable Crutch, he will feel that he has not yet read the conclusion of my story, and will look forward to the publication of a supplementary volume of adventures, similar to these—look forward, I heartily assure him, only to be bitterly disappointed. Linger over this volume, gentle reader, for when you have laid it down you will hear of John Smith, the man of the Crutch, no more. He is a dead letter.
But now for that disposition. This remarkable character must be got rid of some how. But how? I can think of no end for him so fitting as death.
So, dear reader, as I have abandoned the idea of concluding with an account of my marriage; as death is a circumstance of almost as much importance in one’s history; and as I am supported in this course by eminent precedent—Moses having given a graphic account of his own death in Deuteronomy; and as, moreover, this may be read years hence, when the hand that is writing it has indeed grown cold, and the pen fallen from its weary grasp, (and when there will be a vacant crutch to let,) I will conclude by simply stating that I died.
J-o-h-n•S-m-i-t-h.
[1]. Our Boys. Comprising the personal experiences of the author while in the army, and embracing some of the richest and raciest scenes of army and camp life ever published. By A. F. Hill, of the Eighth Pa. Reserves. With portrait of the author on steel, and several characteristic illustrations on wood. 12mo. Cloth, price $1.75.
[2]. The White Rocks; Or, the Robbers of the Monongahela. A thrilling story of Outlaw Life in Western Pennsylvania. By A. F. Hill, author of “Our Boys,” etc., etc. 12mo. Cloth, price $1.75.
[3]. Pedrillo, a licentiate who accompanied Don Juan, and was his tutor.
[4]. This is an allusion to the moving of buildings, which is carried on to a considerable extent in San Francisco. It is no unusual thing there, to move a frame building as much as a mile when the owner finds it profitable to sell the ground it stands on.