“Derned if I know,” replied Cap’n Pem. “Spit it out, ye ol’ sinner, what did ye do?”
Mike grinned. “Shure,” he replied, “Oi woke up!”
“Dern yer ol’ hide!” exploded Pem. “I’ll git one over on ye fer that, blowed ef I don’t.”
“Was you ever shipmates along of a mutiny, Mister Potter?” asked one of the men, when the merriment over Mike’s joke on Cap’n Pem had subsided.
“Can’t say as I was,” admitted the old whaleman. “Heard lots o’ yarns ’bout ’em, though.”
“Well, I can beat you there,” asserted the other. “’Cause I was ’board a ship what had a mutiny.”
“Tell us about that,” begged the boys.
“Well, ’twasn’t much of a mutiny,” went on the man, “but I guess ’twas ’bout the funniest mutiny ever was, at that. Manuel, speakin’ ’bout the Pedro Varela, minded me of it, ’cause that’s the ship ’twas on.
“I’d shipped as seaman an’ ’thout countin’ me an’ my two mates an’ the officers, what was Portugees, every man was a greenie. ‘All American crew,’ they called it, but I’ll bet my lay ’gainst a chew of tobaccer there wasn’t two real Yanks in the bunch. Worst set of bums I ever see, an’ not casting no reflections on present company. Officers couldn’t do nothing at all with ’em—never did learn the riggin’, even though the Varela’s just a fore-an’-aft schooner,—an’ didn’t have enough gumption to pull a boat decent. Just the same, things went along pretty well an’ we got a little oil; but along about six weeks out, the men commenced for to get tired of whalin’ an’ wanted to get ashore,—grumbled a bit an’ cussed the skipper an’ all, but no open complainin’ an’ nothing particular to complain about. Then, one morning, Chips come runnin’ an’ a cussin’ an’ saying his tool box had been stole. Hunted every place, but tools had just nat’rally disappeared. Next morning, along comes the cooper swearin’ his tools an’ the grinstone’d gone. Next morning, ’twas the blubber-kettles missin’ an’ by that time things begun to look mighty serious an’ funny. Skipper had all hands aft, but every man-jack swore he didn’t know nothin’ an’ there wasn’t no proof that they did. While the Old Man was chinnin’ the lookout sighted a whale an’ the skipper left off an’ ordered the crew to the boats, an’ what do you think happened? Why, bless you! There weren’t an iron or lance or fluke-spade or any darned thing in any one of the boats. ’Course there weren’t no use in lowering, an’ believe me, there was some skyhowlin’ rumpus on the old Varela when the Portugee skipper let loose. But he couldn’t do nothing. There we was, on the high seas a-cruisin’ for sperm, an’ not an iron on the ship for to get ’em with. An’ when we got to searchin’ about we found there weren’t a spade or a blubber-hook or a cuttin’ in tackle, neither. Of course, we all knew what ’twas. That crew of bums had just heaved every darned thing over the side long in the night watches an’ knowing if the skipper couldn’t catch whales, he’d nat’rally have to make port. Well, there weren’t nothing left for him to do but make port so, talkin’ something fierce in United States and Portugee, he heads for Fayal swearin’ to clap every man-jack in irons soon as he got there. Worst of it was he blamed every mother’s son of us, Yanks as well as the greenies. When we made Fayal, there, big as life, was a Yankee cruiser an’ soon as we got near, up goes a signal for assistance and a-sayin’ there’s a mutiny on board.
“I dunno whether them navy men was so tickled at the fun of the thing or what ’twas, but the up-shot was they had us all aboard an’ talked a bit, though I knowed they was a bustin’ themselves tryin’ not to laff, an’ after a heap of questioning, they let all but eight of us loose an’ ironed the others an’ took ’em home for trial. I was on the beach but got a ship after a bit an’ when I got back to New Bedford I heard the rest of the story. Seemed this ’ere mutiny was a new kind. No law’d ever been made to cover it an’ accordin’ to law the men hadn’t mutinied—didn’t use violence nor threaten nobody nor disobey orders—so they couldn’t be charged with mutiny. Then the owners tried to get ’em sent up for theft or destroyin’ property or most anything, but there weren’t no proof of nothing, so the judge finally sentenced ’em for disorderly conduct an’ they got ten days each.”