“That Mother Goose’s nose last night,” said Floy, “had wax on it to make it long.”
“Nice way that,” said Hiram. “But, Mr. Tompkins, are you sure you can keep from laughing?”
Hiram had a reason for asking this question.
“Oh, yes! perfectly, perfectly sure,” said Mr. Tompkins. “Make me laugh, I’ll pay forfeit.”
Mr. Tompkins was so eager to show that he could keep from laughing, that he agreed to pay any kind of forfeit, and to dress in any kind of way.
Hiram took him into the house, and dressed him. First he lengthened out his nose with a piece of warm wax; then he tied a handkerchief over his head for a cap (for a cap-border he pinned on some strips of newspaper); and then he put a large round cape over his shoulders. A black shawl served for a skirt. When all this was done, he told Mr. Tompkins that he might sit down in the house and wait a few moments. He had a reason for telling him that.
Cousin Floy, a little while before, when the “goose” was being dressed, told Hiram of a way by which one of the actors was made to laugh at the “real party” she went to; and Hiram thought it would be fun to try it with Mr. Tompkins.
So, while Mr. Tompkins was sitting down to wait a few moments, they went into another room, and got a pillow, and dressed it up to look like an old woman. First they tied a string around the pillow, near one end, to make a head. On one side of this head they marked eyes, nose, and mouth with a piece of charcoal. Then they took a waterproof, stuffed out the sleeves for arms, and put that on the pillow-woman. Then they went up into grandma Plummer’s room, and borrowed an old cap, black bonnet, and spectacles, and put those on.
When the pillow-woman was ready, Floy ran and told them all to be sure and not laugh loudly when they saw what was coming, for fear Mr. Tompkins might hear them. The pillow-woman was then taken out by Hiram, and seated in a chair among the other people. He introduced her to them as “Mrs. Mulligachunk.” He pinned together the wrists of her stuffed arms, and let them drop in her lap, and placed a bundle on them to cover the place where there should have been hands. The bundle was tied up in a handkerchief. Then he placed a pair of shoes just where they would seem to be her feet, stood an umbrella by her side, and tipped her head back just a little; so that, when Mr. Tompkins should be standing on the wagon, she would appear to be looking him in the face.
“Come, Mother Goose!” cried Hiram; and Mr. Tompkins, in his funny rig, walked from the house, took his stand upon the wagon, and with a very sober face began:—