Mutual congratulations having passed, Merrywell welcomed them to his habitation, significantly informing them at the same time, that notwithstanding his powers of entertainment were just then not what he could wish, all was right, the trick was done, that he was arranging for a house in the Rules, pro tempore, and that it would not be long before he should have the honour of meeting them in a way that would be more agreeable to all parties. “However,” continued he, “if you can bear a confined apartment, I promise you shall have nothing else to complain of. Can you put up with pot-luck in a prison?”
“Certainly,” was the reply, “our object was to spend a convivial hour with you, to wile away a little of the time, to see and learn, to take a peep at things as they are, and to form our judgments upon their existence.”
“Then,” replied Merrywell, “you have arrived en bon heure, for in this place a volume of information may be obtained, which, if judiciously applied, must prove beneficial; and while dinner is preparing, I can afford you abundance of amusement; so come along, we must move round this way to the gate again, in order to take any thing like an accurate survey, and I can furnish some anecdotes of the paraders, the players, the officers of the Court, and the visitors, which cannot fail to prove interesting. This, however, must be done with caution, for suspicion is ever active, and jealousy constantly awake within these walls; and as I mean to give you sketches of individual characters, rather than a general view of the society with which I am now in association, a little discretion may be well made use of.”
“Now let us analyse, but not too loud, If wise, the composition of this crowd; Made up from native soil and foreign clime, Of waste and folly, accident and crime. Here join the Speculator and the Fool, Greybeards, and youngsters rather tit for school, (At least for any school but this alone, Where College vices in the shade are thrown.) Of pugilists, of haberdashers, jugglers, Horse jockeys, swindlers, Bond Street beaux, and smugglers, By hollow friendship some in prison thrown, By others' follies some—more by their own.”
By this time they had traversed round the open walk of the prison, and on arriving at the place of entrance—
“Do you observe that small building on the right? it is called the State House, and contains the largest and most convenient rooms; it is usually devoted to the accommodation of such as are best enabled to pay; and there are persons residing here, who live as well, and in as dashing a style as those without the walls, or at least pay as much for their living. On the left hand you may also perceive the chapel, for the spiritual wants of those confined are not to be forgotten.”
“There, in the centre, is the chapel door, With ever changing notices spread o'er: Whatever doctrines may within be taught, With words of peace that door is rarely fraught: For there, mid notices of beds for hire, Of concerts in the state-house by desire, Some ill-spelt scrawl demands the mighty debt Of half a crown, with a ferocious threat; Some traitorous agent is denounced; some spy, That blabb'd of gin, is hung in effigy; Here angry fools proclaim the petty jar, And clumsy pasquinades provoke to war.”
By this time they had reached the door of the Chapel, which, by the various placards pasted against it, fully confirmed the description of Merrywell.
Bob, casting his eyes around him, discovered much for enquiry. “Who are those in the corner in close conversation together?”
“The farthest from us,” replied Merrywell, “is a Jew attorney, well acquainted with all the shuffling arts of the place; one who can explain the whole game, from raising the wind, down to the White-washing Act, for the knowledge and experience of gentlemen in these days are astonishing. You would scarcely believe it, but such is the fact, there are rakes of quality and of fashion, who are their own farriers, horse dealers, who know every trick upon the cards and dice—cutting, shuffling, slipping, cogging, securing; who have cards and dice always at hand, and ready made to their hand; who, although they are awake to a good thing, know the odds to a nicety, and can give or take according as it may best suit their purpose, yet are not properly initiated in all requisite mysteries, till a sort of finish is given to their education, by a temporary retirement here; where they learn a sufficiency of the law to give information on all the quirks and quibbles of the arrest laws, of bailing, demurring, justifying bail, putting in bail above, of writs of error, county and Marshalsea writs, of letters of licence, the laws against usury, the bankrupt laws, and finally of acts of grace; perhaps the last and only one in their lives bearing that name: but we must walk on, or we may be overheard.”