Young men, avoid the first drink. Never take that first fatal glass; thus, and only thus, are you safe from a drunkard’s grave, and the curse entailed upon your progeny.
Strength in Weakness.
“Sir, I am advised that you have a barrel of beer in your room,” said the president of one of our New England colleges to a student, who, contrary to rule and usage, had actually purchased a barrel of the delightful stuff made from brewed hops, copperas, and filthy slops, and deposited it under the bed, convenient for use.
“Yes, sir; such is the fact,” replied the student.
“What explanation can you give for such conduct, sir?”
“Well,” began the student with the boldest confidence, “the truth is, my physician, in consideration of my ill health, advised me to take a little ale daily; and not wishing to be seen visiting the beer-shops where the beverage is retailed, I decided to buy a barrel, and take it quietly at my room.”
“Indeed! and have you derived the anticipated benefit therefrom, sir?” inquired the president.
“O, yes, sir; indeed I have. Why, when I first had the barrel placed in my room two weeks ago, I could not move it. Now, sir, I can carry it with the greatest of ease.”
The president smiled, and ordered the barrel removed, saying that “in consideration of his rapid convalescence the treatment could safely be discontinued.”
A warm Place for a Cook.