Thereupon the rider flew into a furious rage, and began belabouring the unfortunate horse without mercy, though, as it proved this time, not without effect. Anticipating a smart stroke of the whip, which the upraised arm of his master was preparing to inflict, the animal began to kick and plunge, and after two or three curvets, both horse and rider came to the ground.
I, seeing this mishap, pressed forward my mule, which, by the bye, was anything but swift footed. Having reached the spot where the unlucky student lay rolling in the dust, and uttering a torrent of imprecations, I quickly dismounted, saying—“Compose yourself, señor, and let me assist you to rise. These accidents must be expected by persons who journey on the backs of such crazy animals.”
“Crazy animals!” said he, “your’s appears crazy enough; but I have only to thank the high spirit and mettle of mine for bringing me to this strait!”
Restraining my laughter as I best could, and with as grave a face as I was able to put on, I helped the fallen horseman to rise, which was no easy matter, for he appeared to be much hurt. Having got him upon his feet, I beheld before me the strangest figure in the world. He was short of stature, and on his shoulders there was a graceful hump, which might be likened to an estrambote,[49] tacked to a sonnet, and which brought to my recollection the stanzas in praise of hunch-backs indited by the ingenious Licentiate Tamuriz.[A] His legs were curved like two slices of melon, and his feet were encased in shoes, twelve inches long; and perhaps, without incurring any mistake, I might assign to them even greater magnitude.
The student raised his hands to his head, as if to assure himself that his pericranium had sustained no fracture. Feeling the effects of his fall, he turned to me, and, in a faint and languid tone of voice, said, that since I was a doctor (which he must have conjectured from seeing that I rode on a mule),[50] he begged I would tell him of some remedy to cure his aching bones.
I returned for answer, that I was not a doctor, but that even if I were as well skilled in the knowledge of medicine as Juan de Villalobos,[B] of the bygone time, or as Nicolo Monardes, of the time present,[C] I could prescribe for him no better physic than rest and sleep; and I added, that as noontide was advancing, the best cure for his aching bones would be to recline for a while beneath the shade of some trees which grew by the road side. There I proposed we should seek shelter against Apollo’s scorching rays, until, less oppressed by heat and weariness, we might each pursue our course.
“This is strange,” resumed the student in the same doleful tone in which he had before spoken. “Who could have imagined that by reason of the vicious temper of that unruly beast, the whole body of a bachelor of Salamanca should be thus bruised from head to foot! Mark me! I say of Salamanca, not of Alcalá, where none but poor miserable fellows graduate; but by so doing they lose all the privileges and immunities enjoyed by Spanish hidalgos at Salamanca. Alas! what a disaster has befallen me. They told me at the inn that I should find this horse restive and unruly. Nevertheless, he is a fine animal. His smooth sleek skin denotes his high breeding. How finely shaped are his limbs, how black and well rounded his hoofs, and so hollow and dry underneath! His pasterns are short; neither too high nor too low; thereby indicating strength. His fore-legs are sinewy, and his shins short and well formed; the knees firm, smooth, and large. How full and fleshy are his hind quarters, and how round and expanded his chest. His nostrils are so wide and distended, that one can discern the ruddy tint within them. His mouth is large, and the dilated veins are visible in every part of his fine head.”[51]
Perceiving that my friend the bachelor was preparing to extend still further the catalogue of excellent qualities which were neither possessed by his horse, nor by any of his horse’s race, I cut the matter short by saying, very composedly, “Pardon me, señor, if I cannot descry in your horse any of the beauties and merits which are so apparent to you. The limbs which you admire, appear to me very ill formed; the sleek skin you extol to the skies, is covered with marks and cuts; and as to his full black eyes, I wish I may lose my own eyes if I see anything in them but the overflowing of the vicious humours inherent in the nature of the miserable beast.”