VAN. I believe I understood you to say that you had called to— Sir, will you permit me to ask you one question? I throw myself entirely upon your generosity. Did you—frankly—did you expect to find me here?
AUGUS. No, sir, frankly, I did not—certainly not.
VAN. Sir, I thank you; you have removed a weight from my mind. I could scarcely believe otherwise, only just arrived, as I am, from abroad.
AUGUS. Only just arrived from abroad—oh, indeed, sir. (aside) Confound the fellow, I wish I could get rid of him. (aloud, after a pause of confusion on both sides) May I inquire what part?
VAN. Oh certainly, sir—certainly. Russia, sir, Russia.
AUGUS. (aside) All a lie, I suppose. (aloud) Indeed, sir. (after another pause) Pray, sir, what may be your opinion of the Russians in general?
VAN. Very nice people, sir—very nice people.
AUGUS. Indeed, sir.
VAN. (rising, after a long pause, during which they have been staring at each other, not knowing what to say) Sir, I am very happy to have met you. Your conversation betokens great intelligence, and I regret extremely that I have not more time to improve the acquaintance, but unfortunately an unlucky engagement—
AUGUS. (taking him up) Pray don’t mention it, sir—pray don’t mention it. (aside) Thank goodness he is going at last. (each puts his chair back, and, fancying the other gone, they meet in the centre, and stare at each other) Well, sir?