It was strangely solemn to be there all alone.
That was the question. If the rest of the party had started without me, they would not expect me to arrive till perhaps an hour after themselves: and then they would wait before doing anything practical. I knew how indignant and grieved Thyrza would be, at the mere thought of my having been left behind alone. Perhaps she would see Mr. Stockmoor: or send some one to meet me. By that time, however, I scarcely saw what she or anybody could do. The walk over the hills in darkness would be no easy matter: and how could they guess where I might be found?
I saw all this very plainly, and it did seem that I should almost certainly have to remain where I was until the morning. The marvel to me now is that I could view the prospect so quietly. I do not think it was stupefaction. I only felt that Christ my Master was with me—absolutely and actually present—whatever might happen: that He would never forsake His own. And four little simple lines kept running in my head:
"His Arm is beneath me,
His Eye is above:
His Spirit within me
Says—'Rest in My love.'"
It seemed at last a certainty that the trick, of which I had not liked to suspect the others, had really been planned. Otherwise I must surely have heard their voices calling my name, when they returned from the search.
"Poor children! How silly of them!" I thought. For I knew that in punishing me, they would—as is so often the case—have punished themselves. And then I reverted to Thyrza, and I did grieve to picture her trouble.
Suppose she went to the Farm, and told Mr. Stockmoor! And suppose—suppose Arthur Lenox were there still! Would he come in search of the missing governess? I felt that anything I might have to endure would be worth such a consummation.
The sound of a slow drop—drop—drop on the pool-surface was followed by big splashes upon my face. Rain came fast; no soft shower, but a pelting sheet of water, hissing down the muddy pathway. Ascent would be worse than ever after this. I should have been thankful for my waterproof cloak, lying far above on the edge. In five minutes my clothes were soaked.
Blacker and blacker grew the sky, heavier and heavier the rain. It was one of Nature's shower-baths. I was soon thoroughly chilled and shivering, less able to bear up. I remember the thought occurring, "Even if I live till daylight, this may mean fatal illness,—may mean the worst!" And then the question, "Would it be 'the worst' to me?" And a murmured, "Even so, my Father,—if so it should seem good in Thy sight."