FROM THYRZA TO NELLIE.
April 22.
MY DEAR NELLIE,—YOU told us all to write quite openly to you, so long as we could manage not to worry Mother. So I am sending a sheet enclosed in a letter from Gladys to you, as she says she has room.
I do wish something could be done about the way Millie goes on. It is perfectly abominable. She sets herself against Miss Con on every possible opportunity, and does her very best to set the girls against her too.
The fact is, Miss Con doesn't flatter Millie, and Millie can't get along without flattery. It is meat and drink to her. And Millie is frightfully jealous of Miss Con, for being taller and better looking and cleverer than herself—and also for being Mother's friend. I do wish sometimes that Mother had just let things alone, instead of trying to arrange for Miss Con to be like a visitor as well as a governess. Millie counts her dining with us every night a tremendous grievance.
Then of course Miss Con does insist upon having schoolroom matters in her own hands. I don't see how she could manage, if she didn't. Millie has no reasonable ground for complaint. Miss Con is always kind and polite to her, and tries to meet her fancies: but Millie does dearly love to rule the roost; and of course she can't be allowed. She is always stirring up mud; wanting to come into the schoolroom for music, just when Miss Con is reading aloud or giving a class lesson; and fidgeting and grumbling over her "rights," till things are unbearable. Maggie always takes Millie's part; and I only wonder Miss Con stays on at all. I do believe it is just for Mother's sake.
It's no earthly use my saying anything to Maggie. She is so cockered up with having to manage the house, that she won't stand a word. If it wasn't that Rouse and the other servants know exactly what to do, I am sure I can't think what we should come to. It's the merest chance whether Maggie remembers to give her orders in time. She forgets to order dinner about twice a week: but happily it comes up just the same. And Millie just twists Maggie round her little finger. The two have endless gossips every night in Millie's room.
I can't tell you how wise Miss Con is with Elfie. She does not think the Elf at all strong, and she is careful not to let her do too much, and to make her have plenty of rest. But all the time there is no sort of fussing or coddling: and she never encourages self-indulgence. She seems to brace up Elfie, without saying much about it: and I never saw Elfie trying so hard not to give way to nervous fads. Somehow Miss Con has a way of making a pleasant duty of a thing, where other people only give one a scolding.
I do wish you knew her, Nellie, for I think you would understand what she is. It isn't often that Mother's favourites are mine. But Miss Con is so unlike the common run of people, so earnest and good and so clever. She seems to have read and heard and thought over everything. And she helps me as nobody else ever did, in other ways—you know what I mean. Her religion is so real; not mere talk. She makes one feel that life may be made really worth living, and that one need not just fritter it away in girlish nothings—like so many. I think I know better now what "living to God" really is than I ever did before. I mean I know what it is, seeing it in Miss Con. But of course all this is only for yourself, and for nobody else. You know how I hate things being passed round and talked over. If I did not feel perfectly sure of you, I would not say a word.
You will know whether you can manage to write anything to Maggie, which might make her behave more sensibly. I'm not at all sure that you can, and quoting me would be no good at all. But anyhow it is a comfort to speak out for once.
I don't send messages to Mother, as this is only for you, and the others don't know me to be writing. I told Gladys I had one or two things to say which you ought to know, though Mother must not: and she is safe not to talk.—Your affectionate sister—
THYRZA.
FROM NELLIE TO MAGGIE.
April 29.
MY DEAREST MAGGIE,—I am going to enclose a note to you in one to Gladys, as we arranged to do sometimes. If it goes in the usual way, I know how difficult it is for you not to show it all round. Father may see this, by all means: but please do not read it aloud at the breakfast-table. However, I am forgetting,—you will not receive it then.
The dear Mother is much the same,—just so far better on some days, that I can send tolerably cheerful accounts. But I do not see any steady improvement; such as one might count upon for the future. I suppose we ought hardly to expect it yet.
I am always thinking about you, darling, and about all the difficulties that you must have to contend with. Managing a big household, without any practice beforehand, is no light matter. I should find difficulties enough in your place: and yet I have had some little training now and then, when Mother has been away from home.
Your private half-sheet reached me safely, though I have not been able to answer it till now. Lately Mother has seemed scarcely able to bear me out of her sight; and if I am writing, she wants to know who it is to and what I have said. And just now, too, she likes me to sleep with her: so for days I have had scarcely a moment alone.
But I do feel very sorry for all the little rubs and worries you speak of. It is so likely that things should be perplexing sometimes, with no real head to be appealed to. For you would not like, any more than I should, to be always bothering Father. And though I know you are doing your very best, yet of course you are young, darling, and only just out of the schoolroom, and you can't have full authority all in a moment over the rest.
Mother's idea has been all along that Miss Conway would act in many ways as a kind of temporary head. I don't mean in ordering dinner, and so on: but in everything connected with you girls. I know it isn't very easy to make things fit in: but, perhaps, the more you can appeal to Miss Conway the better. And I think it ought to be quite clear that Miss Conway has the entire arrangement and management of everything in the schoolroom; and that Millie's plans must yield to hers.
You see, poor Millie has a rather sensitive temper, and she is a little apt to imagine slights. Kind Miss Jackson gave in to her too easily, more than was right. I am afraid Millie has been spoilt by her: and we cannot expect quite the same from Miss Conway. I should be very sorry to think that poor Millie was really unhappy: but I wouldn't, if I were you, help in the nursing of all her small grievances.
I shall be delighted to hear that your book is successful, and that you have fifteen pounds of your own. Writing books is not at all in my line, for I am a very humdrum sort of individual; but it seems quite a nice new amusement for you. I don't think Gladys would be jealous, darling Maggie. Why should she? There is room enough in the world for books by you both. Perhaps she was a little shy about giving too decided an opinion.
Mother wants me, and I must stop.—Ever your loving sister, NELLIE.
FROM MISS CONWAY TO MRS. ROMILLY.
May 1.
MY DEAR MRS. ROMILLY,—I have not hitherto asked leave to write to you, knowing how you need complete rest. But Maggie says that you are expecting and wishing for a few lines.
Some day, when we meet again, I shall have much to say to you about my first impressions of all your girls: though I must not trouble you now with lengthy outpourings. On the whole, I think I gained a tolerably fair notion of most of them from your previous descriptions. Only I expected perhaps that Maggie would be rather more like yourself.
Thyrza is very hard at work over her various studies: and I am struck with her force and energy. She will never turn into a limp pretty young drawing-room lady, with no ideas in life beyond the last novel or the latest fashion. But I do think there are grand possibilities in Thyrza. There is abundance of steam, ready to be utilised. A few angularities now do not mean much.
At present Nona's energies are expended more upon tennis than upon literature. She delights, as you know, in any sort of "fun," and keeps us all with her high spirits; and she takes life easily. That makes one remark more the contrast of your little sensitive brave-spirited Elfie. There is no taking anything easily in Elfie's case; but I think I never saw a girl of sixteen make so hard and resolute a fight not to be mastered. You will, I know, be glad to hear this: Nona seems to be all bright sunshine without shadow, while in Elfie sunshine and shade alternate sharply. She is a dear little creature, and intensely conscientious.
You may be interested and amused to have these passing ideas of mine. I could, of course, say much more, if I did not fear to tire you. We work very steadily at lessons, and take long country rambles, sometimes all together, sometimes in detachments.
How you will enjoy a few days at beautiful Heidelberg! I hope your time in Germany will be as pleasant as your time in Italy has been.
You will understand that I do not expect or wish for any answer. I hear of you constantly. Only try to get well, my dear Mrs. Romilly, as soon as possible,—as soon as it is God's will. Then we may all hope for the joy of welcoming you home.
Believe me still, your affectionate friend—
CONSTANCE CONWAY.
FROM MRS. ROMILLY TO MISS CONWAY.