There ought not to be such a thing as "hotel manners." But there is; and it suggests certain important injunctions.
Hotel partitions are usually thin, and sounds are penetrating. Private affairs should not be loudly discussed. Tourists should learn to converse in quiet tones, and to make as little "racket" as possible with furniture, boots, etc., and to be polite enough not to keep other guests awake late at night with the noise of music, laughter, or loud talking. The "manners" at table, in the reading-rooms, and about the corridors should conform to whatever law of etiquette in private or public life the incidents may indicate; since, at a hotel, one is both at home and not at home, in two different aspects.
In driving with ladies, a gentleman gives them the seat facing the horses, riding backward himself if any one must. He will alight from the carriage first, on the side nearest his seat, to avoid passing in front of the ladies; and will assist them to alight, giving as much or as little support as the case demands. A light finger-tip on an elbow is all the help that a sprightly girl may need, but her grandmother may require to be tenderly lifted out bodily. A gentleman will discriminate, and not use an uncalled-for familiarity in helping a lady out of a carriage.
When several ladies are driving, the youngest ones in the party will ride backwards. A hostess driving with her guests enters her carriage after them, unless they are noticeably younger than she is; but she does not relinquish her usual seat to any one, unless she happens to have a party of venerable ladies.
ETIQUETTE OF GIFTS
Wedding presents should be chosen with due reference to the circumstances of the bride. For the daughter of wealthy parents, who weds a husband of large means—and to whom all desirable useful things are assured—articles of virtu, and bewildering creations in the way of costly "fancy articles," are suitable wedding gifts. For a quiet little bride who is going to housekeeping on a moderate income, articles that are useful as well as beautiful are appropriate and acceptable. A handsome substantial chair, a cabinet for china, pretty china to put in it, some standard books, a set of fine table linen,—almost anything within the range of dainty house-furnishing shows the good taste of the giver.
Presents that owe their creation to the ingenuity and labor of one's friends—as hand-painted screens or china, embroidered work, or, if one is artistic, a painting or etching—are peculiarly complimentary wedding gifts.
In general, the exchange of gifts is desirable only between friends who care enough for each other not only to give, but to be willing to accept—the latter being a severer test of friendship. Between two women, or between two men, these matters adjust themselves.
A man should not offer valuable gifts to any lady outside of his own family, unless she is very much his senior, and a friend of long standing. Similarly, a lady should not accept valuable gifts from a gentleman unless his relationship to her warrants it. Trifling tokens of friendship or gallantry—a book, a bouquet, or a basket of bon-bons—are not amiss; but a lady should not be under obligation to a man for presents that plainly represent a considerable money value.
When a gift is accepted, the recipient should not make too obvious haste to return the compliment, lest he or she seem unwilling to rest under obligation. It is polite to allow a generous friend some space of time in which to enjoy the "blessedness of giving."